Alek watched as the eyes that had been distressed and angry a moment earlier softened with emotion. She blinked, and Alek thought he might have noticed the sheen of tears.
“Naturally. I’ll let my brother know right away and we’ll meet you there as soon as we can. Thank you for contacting me so soon.” She replaced the receiver, stood and started out of the room, apparently forgetting Aleksandr was there.
“Your grandmother is ill?” he asked.
She whirled around, apparently surprised at the sound of his voice, and nodded. “I…have to leave. I don’t believe there’s any need for us to discuss this further. I can’t agree to your conditions. I refuse to be trapped in the type of marriage you’re suggesting. I’d hoped we’d be able to work out some kind of compromise, but that doesn’t seem possible.”
“I’m disappointed. We would’ve had fine children.”
She stared at him as if he’d spoken in his native tongue and she didn’t understand a word he’d said. “Children?” she repeated. A sadness seemed to steal over her; she shook her head, perhaps to dispel the image.
“I will think good things for your grandmother,” Alek told her.
She nodded. “Thank you.” With what looked like hard-won poise, she turned and left the office.
Alek watched her go, and the proud way in which she carried herself tugged at his heart. He wished her grandmother well, but more importantly, he wished Julia a happy life.
Knowing his time in the States was limited to mere days, Aleksandr worked well past five, when his colleagues had all gone home. He felt it was his moral obligation to do everything within his power to see that the next series of experiments was performed to the standards he’d set for the earlier ones. He wouldn’t be with Conrad Industries to oversee the ongoing research, and that bothered him, but he had no choice.
The laboratory was silent, and the footsteps echoing down the wide corridor outside his office were louder than they would otherwise have been.
He raised his eyes expectantly when Julia Conrad opened the door without knocking and walked inside. She was pale, her eyes darker than he’d ever seen them before.
“Julia,” he said, standing abruptly. “Is something wrong?”
She looked sightlessly around, as though she didn’t know where she was or how she got there.
“Your grandmother?”
Julia nodded and gnawed on her bottom lip. “She…she had another heart attack.”
“I’m sorry.”
Her eyes flew upward as if to gauge the sincerity of his words. For a lengthy moment she said nothing. Then she inhaled a shaky breath and bit her lip so hard, Aleksandr was afraid she’d draw blood.
“I…I’ve reconsidered, Mr. Berinski. I’ll marry you under the conditions you’ve set.”
“I don’t want an elaborate wedding.” Julia folded her arms, moving to the far side of her office. Her brother was being impossible. “How could there even be time to arrange one?”
“Julia, you’re not listening to me.”
“I’m listening,” she said sharply. “I just don’t happen to like what I’m hearing.”
“A reception at the Four Seasons isn’t so much to ask.”
“But a wedding with guests and this whole thing about wearing a fancy wedding dress is ridiculous! Jerry, please, this is getting out of hand. I understand marriage is the best solution, but I didn’t realize I’d be forced to endure the mockery of a formal wedding.”
Jerry gestured helplessly. “We’ve got to make this as credible as we can. Apparently you don’t understand how important this is—and not just the wedding, either. That’s only the first hurdle. You have to make everything appear as though you’re madly in love. Nothing less will convince the Immigration people. If you fail… I don’t even want to think about that.”
“You’ve already gone through this.” More times than she cared to count.
“Alek has to live with you, too.”
This was the part that disturbed Julia most. Her condo was her private haven, the one place where she could be completely herself. She was about to lose that, too. “But why?” She knew the answer, had argued until Jerry was seething with exasperation. Julia didn’t blame him, but this marriage was becoming far more complicated than she’d ever thought it would.
“Why?” Jerry shouted, throwing his hands in the air. “I’ve made everything as plain as I can. Alek isn’t the problem, it’s you. What I don’t understand, Julia, is why you’re being so difficult when we’re the ones who stand to benefit from this arrangement.”
“You’re making Alek sound like a saint for marrying me.” She frowned. “And I don’t see you running for the altar.” Jerry had recently ended yet another brief liaison.
He didn’t answer right away, which irritated her even more. “Let’s put it this way,” he finally said. “Conrad Industries is gaining far more from this marriage than Alek ever will. And,” he added, “my marital status is irrelevant.”
Julia rolled her eyes at that. “I offered to pay him, and very generously, too,” she said.
“You insulted him. The man has his pride, Julia. He isn’t doing this for the money.”
“Then why is he going through with it?”
Jerry shrugged. “Darned if I know.”
His words reiterated that Alek wasn’t getting any bargain by marrying her. “He wants to help his family,” Julia reminded her brother. She remembered Alek mentioning a sister and his widowed mother. As the oldest son, Alek would feel responsible for taking care of his family. Julia had promised to do whatever she could to bring both his mother and his sister to the United States. This marriage provided plenty of incentives for Alek, she told herself, so she didn’t need to worry about taking advantage of him.
“There’s more to the man than meets the eye,” Jerry muttered. “I’m convinced he’s not interested in monetary gain. When he read over the prenup, he insisted on no stake in the company. We’re about to make a fortune because of him, and he wants no part of it.”
This discussion wasn’t doing anything to ease Julia’s conscience. “I agreed to the marriage,” she said, not wanting to stray any farther from the subject than they already had. “But no one said anything about a wedding. I thought we’d make an appointment with a justice of the peace and be done with it.” She walked over to her desk, opened the old-fashioned appointment book and flipped through the pages. “Friday at four is open.”
“Julia,” Jerry returned with a sigh. “As I’ve explained—we’ve got to make this as real as we can for obvious reasons.”
“I’ve said Alek can move in with me.” To Julia, that was a major concession. She wasn’t pleased by it, nor did she feel good about tricking Alek. He’d insisted from the first that their marriage be real. He’d made it known that he intended to sleep with her; he also wanted children. Julia couldn’t allow any of that. Alek didn’t understand and neither did Jerry. Julia was incapable of love, the kind of trusting love a husband and wife shared. That possibility was dead, destroyed by Roger’s treachery. Never again would she put her faith in a man. Alek expected her to be his wife in every way, but soon he’d learn the truth. Soon he’d know for himself how badly he was being cheated. Such deception didn’t sit well with Julia, but there was no avoiding it.
While Julia admired Alek, she found herself nervous around him. He left her feeling naked, somehow. Exposed. He seemed to be able to look into her very soul. That didn’t make sense, but she couldn’t shake the suspicion that in some uncanny way he knew all there was to know about her.
“Immigration is going to ask about the wedding,” Jerry went on. “We need proof that what prompted the marriage to Alek was nothing less than earth-shattering love. A hurried-up affair in some judge’s chambers won’t work. They’re going to want evidence of your commitment and devotion to each other.”
“A hurried-up affair at the Four Seasons will convince them of all that?” she asked sarcastically.
Jerry sighed again. “It looks better. Now, I suggest you go out and get yourself a fancy wedding dress while I make arrangements with Virginia. We’ll deal with the caterers and the photographers and see to having the invitations hand-delivered.”
“Jerry, this is crazy!” Julia protested. The idea of dressing up in an elaborate wedding gown, as if she were a loving bride on display, appalled her. Nor was she keen on posing for a series of photographs, like a new wife passionately in love with her husband. It was too much. “I can’t go through with this,” she said evenly.
“You’ve already agreed.”
“To the marriage, yes, but not this…this circus. It’s becoming a Hollywood production, a show for media attention.”
“A show is what we need if we’re going to fool the Immigration investigators,” Jerry argued. “And trust me, Julia, this marriage will be investigated.”
Julia walked over to the window and studied the street several floors below. In a moment of weakness, when her fears had been rampant and she was so deathly afraid of losing Ruth, Julia had gone to Alek and agreed to his terms. Even now she didn’t understand what had prompted her. She was sick of analyzing it, furious with herself for being so weak. This morning, once her head had cleared, she’d realized it had all been a mistake. But by then Alek had contacted Jerry, who’d put everything in motion. Now, it seemed, there was no turning back.
Her intercom hummed before Virginia’s efficient voice reached out to her. “Mr. Berinski is here to see you.”
Julia looked at her brother in sheer panic. She wasn’t prepared to deal with Alek just yet. They hadn’t spoken since she’d consented to the marriage.
“Julia,” Jerry prompted when she didn’t respond.
“Send him in,” Julia instructed her assistant, steeling herself for the confrontation.
No sooner had the words left her mouth than the door leading to her office opened. Alek walked in and his dark eyes shone brightly as he gazed over at her. A slow, seductive smile appeared on his lips.
“Good afternoon.” Alek spoke to her brother first, then returned his attention to her. “Julia.”
“Alek,” she said briskly, surprised by how defensive she sounded.
He didn’t seem perturbed by her lack of welcome. Last night she’d agreed to become his wife, accepting the stipulations he’d set. She’d been overwrought with anxiety, frightened and lost. Yet no matter how hard she argued with herself, Julia wouldn’t change her mind…unless Alek wanted out. She was a woman of honor, a woman of her word. She knew he was the same way.
“I was just clearing the wedding arrangements with Julia,” Jerry explained.
Alek’s eyes refused to leave her. She felt her face heat and wished with everything in her that she could escape.
“I’d like some time alone with my fiancée,” Alek said.
Julia sent Jerry a pleading glance, not wanting him to leave her. Jerry ignored the unspoken request, mumbled something under his breath and walked out of the room.
“You want to talk?” she asked abruptly. She rubbed her palms and walked away from him. Her shoulders felt stiff and her legs heavy.
“You’re nervous.”
Nervous. Terrified. Afraid. None of those words adequately described what Julia was experiencing. The situation had an eerie, unreal quality that she couldn’t shake. Only a few years earlier she’d looked forward to being a happy bride. She’d dreamed of the day Roger would slip a wedding band on her finger and gaze down at her with love.
She felt a flash of unexpected pain, then forced herself to shake the image from her head.
“All brides are nervous,” she said quietly in response to his question.
“How is your grandmother?”
“I’ll be seeing her this afternoon.… Better, I believe.” According to the nurse Julia had spoken with that morning, Ruth had slept restfully through the night. But that had been after Jerry had spoken to her and said Julia would be marrying Aleksandr Berinski. Her grandmother had only met Alek once, and that had been recently. He’d obviously made quite an impression, because his name had cropped up with alarming frequency ever since.
“Do you wish to cancel the wedding?” Alek probed.
Here was her chance, handed to her on the proverbial silver platter. All she needed to do was tell him that she hadn’t been herself, that she hadn’t been fully aware of what she was doing. She opened her mouth to explain it all away and found she couldn’t. The words refused to come. While she was fumbling for a reply, he stepped behind her and rested his hands on her shoulders. He leaned forward, gently kissing the side of her neck.
Julia froze. It was the first time a man had touched her since Roger. She couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe. Alek didn’t seem to notice. Sliding his arms around her, he brought her against him. His breath stirred shivers along her spine and a curious warmth crept into her blood.
Alek turned her around to face him. She wasn’t given the opportunity to object as he pressed his mouth to hers. His lips moved slowly over hers. She wedged her hands between them, braced her palms against his hard chest and pushed herself free. Her lungs felt as though they were about to burst, and she drew in a deep breath.
Alek didn’t seem offended or surprised by her actions. His eyes danced with mischief as they sought hers. Julia raised the back of her hand to her mouth and held it there. She burned with anger. He’d done this intentionally so she’d know he expected to touch her and kiss her often after the ceremony. She was to be his wife in every sense of the word and he wouldn’t tolerate a loveless, sexless marriage. He wanted her and he was making sure she knew it.
What was she going to do?
Julia stood outside the bridal shop with all the thrill and anticipation of a long-overdue visit to the dentist.
She opened the door and walked inside, grateful the saleswoman wasn’t busy.
“Hello.”
“Hello,” Julia said stiffly, fanning out the billowing chiffon skirt of a pale yellow bridesmaid’s dress that hung from a rack.
“May I help you?” came the friendly voice.
Julia revealed her lack of enthusiasm with a noncommittal shrug. “I need a wedding dress for this Friday afternoon.”
The shopkeeper was petite, hardly more than five feet tall with soft brown hair. The woman was a dreamer; Julia could see it in her eyes. She, too, had once worn that same look of innocence.…
“The wedding is this Friday?”
“I know that doesn’t give me much time,” Julia said, feeling foolish. “It’s one of those spur-of-the-moment things.”
“Don’t worry,” the saleswoman assured her, hurrying toward a long rack of plastic-covered wedding dresses. “Spur-of-the-moment weddings are often the most romantic.”
Julia had nothing to add. She could tell that this woman was more than a dreamer; she was also hopelessly sentimental. She had her head in the clouds when it came to love, and no doubt her attitude had been influenced by her job. She dealt with women who were deeply in love, women for whom the entire world was there for the taking.
Three years earlier, Julia had been one of them. Young, enthusiastic and so much in love she didn’t recognize what should’ve been obvious.
“I’d like a very plain dress,” she said forcefully, breaking off her thoughts.
“Plain,” the woman repeated slowly.
“The plainer the better,” Julia reiterated, strolling about the store.
“I’m afraid I have a limited selection of plain dresses.”
That was what Julia feared. “Something simple, then.”
“Simple and elegant?” she asked, grinning approvingly. “Would you like to look through this rack? Choose the designs that appeal to you, I’ll get them in your size, and then you can try them on.”
As far as Julia was concerned, this business with the wedding dress was a waste of time. She wanted it to be over and done with so she could head for the hospital and visit Ruth.
The saleswoman led her to the appropriate display of gowns. Julia shuffled through them quickly, making two selections. Neither dress really appealed to her.
“I’ll try on these two,” Julia said.
The woman made no comment as she went into the back room and returned a few minutes later with the two dresses in the correct size. She took them into the dressing room and placed them on the hook.
Julia obediently followed her inside. She undressed and slipped into the first dress. It was just as the saleswoman had promised. Simple and elegant. A straight skirt made of silk, a beaded yoke and cuffs. It looked fine, Julia supposed.
“No,” the shop-owner said with certainty. “This one doesn’t suit you.”
“It looks…”
“No,” the woman repeated. “Don’t even bother to try on the next dress. It wouldn’t suit you, either.”
“Please, I don’t have a lot of time.”
“The dress is one of the most important aspects of your wedding. Every bride deserves to feel beautiful on her special day.”
Julia didn’t know why she felt like crying, but she did. Buckets of tears welled up inside her. She was grateful the woman didn’t seem to notice. Brides deserved a whole lot more than feeling beautiful; they deserved to marry a man they loved. A man who loved them, too.
“Wait here,” she instructed. She left the changing area and came back a moment later carrying a lovely ornate dress. The silk gown with pearls and sequins was anything but simple. Rarely had Julia seen a dress as intricate as this.
“Try it on,” she said when Julia hesitated.
“I…I don’t think I should.”
“Nonsense. This dress was designed for someone with your body type. It’s perfect. It arrived this afternoon, almost as though I’d sent away for it with you in mind.”
“I don’t know,” Julia murmured. The woman held up the gown for her inspection. It was lovely, ten times more elaborate than the one she’d tried on earlier. Ten times more beautiful, too. It was the kind of dress a woman in love would choose, knowing her groom would treasure its beauty. Would treasure her beauty. A groom who’d cherish her devotion all his life. It was the style of dress she would’ve worn for Roger before she learned of his betrayal. Before she’d learned what a fool she’d been.
She wanted to argue, but one look convinced her that the woman would hear none of it. Not exactly sure why she’d allowed this stranger to dictate her actions, Julia put on the dress. The silk and taffeta rustled as it slid effortlessly over her hips. She kept her eyes lowered as she turned around and the shopkeeper fastened the small pearl closures down her back.
Julia felt strangely reluctant to look into a mirror, almost fearing her own reflection. When she did raise her eyes to the glass, she was startled at the beautiful young woman who gazed back at her. It took her a wild second to realize it was herself.
Gone were the lines that told of the bitterness and disappointment she’d carried with her since her father’s death. The cool, disinterested look in her eyes had warmed. The calculating side of her personality faded, replaced by the woman she’d been before she’d fallen in love with Roger Stanhope. Open, trusting, naive—too young for her years.
Unable to look at herself any longer, Julia dragged her eyes away from the graceful reflection of the woman she’d once been. The woman Roger’s deception had destroyed.
“It’s perfect,” the saleswoman was saying with a sigh of appreciation. “Just perfect. It’s as if the dress was meant for you.”
Julia opened her mouth to contradict the woman, but before she could voice her objection she looked at the mirror one last time. A few days earlier she’d caught a stormy glimpse of herself reflected in her office window. She’d disliked what she’d seen, the woman she’d become, cold, uncaring and driven.
She’d quickly abandoned her self-analysis and had concentrated on what was happening with Alek and Jerry at the Immigration office instead. The events of that afternoon had resulted in this farce of a wedding.
Alek had been adamant that there be no divorce. Julia had agreed to those terms, but not in the spirit he’d intended. If it weren’t for these particular circumstances, Julia doubted she would ever have married. This would be her only wedding, her one chance to wear such a beautiful gown.
“I’ll take it,” she said, calling herself a fool even as she spoke.
“Somehow I knew you would.” The saleswoman grinned broadly.
It took an additional twenty minutes, while the dress was wrapped up and the bill paid, before Julia was able to leave the shop. Nervously she glanced at her watch as she headed toward her parked car. She was already late and knew Ruth would be worried.
As often as she’d visited hospitals, Julia could never accustom herself to the antiseptic smell. She rushed down the polished hallway to the wing that housed her grandmother. She hated the thought of Ruth being here, away from her comfortable home and the pictures she loved and kept close to her side.
Ruth had tried repeatedly to prepare Julia for her death, but Julia refused to listen, refused to accept life without her adored grandmother.
Checking in at the nurses’ station, Julia was left to wait until Velma Williams, the head nurse, returned. A striking arrangement of red, blue, yellow and white flowers overfilled an inverted straw hat on a corner of the long counter. Julia admired it as she stood there. A few minutes later, Velma was back and Julia was ushered to Ruth’s side.
“Good afternoon,” Julia whispered. She couldn’t tell if Ruth was sleeping or simply resting her eyes. Her grandmother seemed to be doing more of both lately. There were various tubes and pieces of equipment attached to Ruth’s body, monitoring her heart and administering drugs intravenously. Julia looked down on this woman she loved so much and had to force back her growing sense of alarm. It seemed to ring in her ears, announcing that the time was fast approaching when Ruth would no longer be with her.
The older woman’s eyes gradually drifted open. “Julia, my dear, I’m so glad you’re here. Come, sit with me.”
Julia pulled up a chair and sat next to the high hospital bed. “How are you feeling?”
Ruth gestured weakly with her hand. “That’s not important now. Tell me about you and Alek. How I’ve prayed for this day. How I’ve hoped you’d learn to love again.”
“The wedding’s on Friday afternoon.” Julia half suspected her grandmother would find the timing suspicious, but instead Ruth smiled tenderly and a faraway look came into her tired eyes.
“Friday… It’s a good thing you won’t have a long engagement, because I doubt I’ll last more than a week or two.”
“Grandma, please don’t say that. You’re going to be around for years and years.”
The weary smile didn’t waver. “I won’t see my great-grandchildren.”
Julia wanted to argue with her, but she couldn’t; there’d never be children for her and Alek because there would never be a real marriage. She suffered a slight twinge of guilt but pushed it aside as a luxury she couldn’t afford.
“I’m sorry I’m late but I was trying on wedding dresses,” Julia explained, injecting some enthusiasm into her voice. She was mildly surprised at how little effort it required to sound excited about the dress she’d bought at the bridal shop. She described it in detail and was pleased at the way her grandmother’s eyes brightened.
“You and Alek will come see me after the ceremony, won’t you?”
“Of course,” Julia promised.
Ruth motioned toward the nurses’ station. “He sent me flowers. He’s a very thoughtful boy. Velma carried in the bouquet for me to see. Did you notice them?” “Who sent you flowers?”
“Your Alek. An enchanting arrangement, and such a sweet thing to do. I like him, Julia. You’ve chosen well, my dear.”
Julia was uncomfortable talking about Alek. He’d been foremost in her thoughts all day and she wanted to escape him, escape the memory of his gentle kiss.
“Tell me about your romance. You’ve been so close-mouthed about it all…yet I knew.” Ruth’s eyes closed slowly and she sighed. With what seemed to be a good deal of effort she opened her eyes again. “He’s a special man, that one. Just hearing about you two gladdens my heart.”
“Ah…” Julia hesitated, not sure what to say. “It all happened rather quickly…almost overnight.”
“So I gathered.” A spark appeared in Ruth’s eyes. “Oh, how I adore a love story. Tell me more before I fall back asleep.”
“Alek’s green card was about to expire.” Keeping everything as close to the truth as possible made this much easier.
“His green card,” Ruth repeated. “Of course, I’d forgotten.”
“He was going to have to return to Russia.”
“And you realized you couldn’t let that happen, didn’t you?”
“I hadn’t realized how important he was to me,” Julia said, adding drama to her voice. “Jerry did everything he could to persuade the Immigration people to let Alek stay, but nothing he said convinced them. The three of us were talking and suddenly I understood how vital it was to me that Alek remain in the United States. I…don’t think I could bear to go on without him.” This was a stretch, but Julia knew what a romantic her grandmother was. If she was exaggerating the truth just a little, it was a small price to pay to satisfy Ruth.
“Julia, my sweet child.” Her grandmother’s delicate hand reached for Julia’s and she squeezed her fingers. “I always trusted that in time you’d open your heart to love again. It took a special man like Alek. Be happy, my child. Promise me you won’t let go until you’ve found your joy.”
Julia wasn’t sure she understood Ruth’s words. They made little sense to her. She would have questioned her if Ruth hadn’t chosen that moment to slip into a peaceful slumber. For several minutes Julia remained at her grandmother’s side, taking in the solace she felt whenever she spent time with Ruth.
“Julia.” The sound of her name, said with that soft European accent, caught her attention. She jerked around to find Alek standing in the doorway.
She got up abruptly, resenting his intrusion into these quiet moments. She walked toward the door, not wanting him to interrupt her grandmother’s rest.
“What are you doing here?” she asked when they were well into the corridor.
The edge of his mouth lifted in a half smile. “I came to see you. There is much we need to discuss.” He tucked her hand in the crook of his elbow and sauntered over to the elevator.
“I left the wedding arrangements in Jerry’s hands. He’ll look after everything. As far as I can see, there’s nothing to discuss.”
She saw the anger in him, in the prideful squaring of his shoulders and the way his mouth thinned.
“You want me, Julia, and you need me. I just wonder how long it will take before you realize this.”
The arrogance of the man was beyond description. She glared at him. She needed no one, especially a man, and never a husband. She wanted to shout out the words, but a hospital corridor was the last place to do that.
Long seconds passed as they stared into each other’s eyes.
“You need me,” he said again.
“You’re wrong,” she returned defiantly. Conrad Industries needed him; she didn’t.
Their eyes lingered and it seemed neither of them knew what to say or do next. Jerry had mentioned how proud Alek was, and she could see that colossal ego for herself. He released her arm and turned away.
He was several yards down the hospital corridor before Julia spoke. “I don’t need you, Alek,” she called after him. She had to say something. They’d quickly make each other miserable if this friction between them continued. If he wouldn’t make an effort, then it was up to her.
“So you’ve already said.”
“But I am willing to admit we need each other.”
Grinning, he turned back. His smile grew as he returned to her side. For a heartbeat, he said nothing. Then he lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her. His touch was as gentle as before. Light as air, it left her wondering if she’d imagined his kiss.
“Why did you do that?” she asked.
His smile was worth waiting for. “Because, my soon-to-be-wife, you deserved it.” He brushed the hair away from her face. “For that matter,” he said with a roguish grin, “so did I.”
Pulsuz fraqment bitdi.