‘It usually works,’ Anna assured her. ‘But don’t worry if you have to give it a couple of goes. The more agitated you get, the more Sam will play you up.’
Sam was reluctant to leave his exciting new toys at first but he was finally persuaded that he could play with them another day. Anna followed as Ben saw them out. The waiting room was empty and Eileen had started switching off the lights now that everyone had left. The receptionist sighed ruefully when she saw Anna.
‘Talk about being thrown in at the deep end! I bet you’re sorry that you took this job.’
Anna laughed. ‘Oh, it will take more than that to put me off. I’m far tougher than I look.’
‘You’ll need to be, working here,’ Eileen retorted, winking at her. She pretended not to have noticed that Ben had come back into the room. ‘It’s not just the general public who lead you a merry dance, I’m afraid. Some members of the staff here would try the patience of a saint at times.’
‘I wonder why my ears are burning? You weren’t alluding to me, by any chance, were you, Eileen?’ he asked wryly.
‘Now, why should you think that?’ the receptionist retorted. ‘It wouldn’t have anything to do with the fact that you told three people to make appointments for Monday morning when I’d already warned you that your list was full?’
‘Sorry.’ Ben tried to look contrite but his eyes were full of laughter when he turned to Anna. ‘Eileen is a real termagant when it comes to her appointment system. It’s a big mistake to fall foul of her, believe me. You end up having to make your own coffee for the next week!’
‘I’m only trying to safeguard your interests, Dr Cole,’ the receptionist said with a sniff, although Anna could tell that she wasn’t really offended. It was obvious that Ben had a good relationship with the older woman.
‘I know you are. And I am grateful. Honestly.’ Ben gave Eileen a warm smile. ‘We wouldn’t be able to run this place half as efficiently without you here to keep order, Eileen.’
‘Well, I don’t know about that,’ she said. However, it was obvious that she was pleased by the compliment. They exchanged a few more pleasantries then Eileen fetched her coat and left.
Ben sighed as the door closed. ‘That’s it, then. End of another busy morning. Thanks again for all your help, Anna. I really appreciate it.’
‘It was nothing,’ she assured him. She glanced at her watch as he went behind the desk to turn off the rest of the lights. ‘Anyway, I’d better get a move on. I want to get to the shops before they close,’ she explained when he turned to look at her. ‘I need to stock up on groceries.’
‘You didn’t bring any with you?’
‘I never gave it a thought, to be honest. I had too many other things on my mind.’ Her face clouded as she thought about what had happened that morning. She still felt sick when she recalled what had been said…
‘Are you OK?’
She jumped, feeling the colour rush to her cheeks when she saw the concern in Ben’s eyes. She had a sudden urge to pour out the whole miserable story before it struck her what a mistake that would be.
She couldn’t afford to tell anyone the truth just yet. Although Ben Cole had come across as both kind and sympathetic, there was no knowing how he might react. Did she really want to run the risk of losing this job?
‘I’m fine. Just a bit worn out after all the rushing around,’ she replied evasively.
‘No wonder. As Eileen said, you were rather pushed in at the deep end.’
He smiled at her and Anna felt a flurry ripple through her when she saw the appreciation in his eyes. It was obvious that Ben found her attractive, and whilst part of her rejoiced in the fact another part knew that it would be a mistake to encourage him.
‘How about if I gave you a lift into town?’ he continued. ‘You can get your shopping then I’ll drive you back here so that you don’t need to lug a lot of heavy bags. In fact, we could have some lunch first—’
‘No!’ She saw his start of surprise but she had to make her position clear once and for all. ‘There’s no easy way to say this, Dr Cole, so I may as well be blunt. I prefer to keep my private life and my professional one strictly separate.’
She shrugged, feeling a shiver working its way down her spine when she saw how he was looking at her now. There was no warmth in his gaze any longer, just a remoteness that made her heart ache in the strangest way. ‘Whilst I intend to give one hundred per cent commitment during surgery hours, I’m not interested in fostering any kind of relationship with colleagues outside those times. Have I made myself clear?’
‘As crystal, Miss Clemence. I apologise if I was overstepping the mark.’
His tone crackled with ice, leaving her in little doubt that he wouldn’t make the same mistake again. He switched off the last remaining lights then strode around the desk, pausing when he realised that she was still standing there. Anna had to steel herself when she caught the full force of his icy stare.
‘Was there something else, Miss Clemence? If not, I’d like to set the alarm and lock up.’
‘I don’t appear to have a key to the back door of the flat,’ she explained woodenly. ‘I’ll need it to get in and out over the weekend.’
‘I’ll see if it’s in Adam’s desk,’ he told her curtly. He swung round, leaving Anna to follow. She was miserably aware that he was annoyed with her. Not that she blamed him, of course. She’d been rude as she’d laid down the ground rules. Her only excuse was that she’d had no choice.
‘Here it is.’ He offered her the key then looked steadily at her. ‘Is that all now?’
‘Yes.’ She cleared her throat but it was an effort to force the words past the lump in it when she saw the chill in his eyes. ‘Thank you.’
He inclined his head, although he didn’t say anything as he strode past her. Anna watched him go into the office then turned and quickly made her way to the stairs. She was halfway up them when she heard the alarm beeping, followed a few seconds later by the sound of the front door closing. And it seemed to her that she had never felt more alone than she did at that moment.
Ben had offered her the hand of friendship and she had rejected it. Maybe she’d had no choice but it hurt to know that he wouldn’t offer it to her again. It struck her all of a sudden that she would have liked to have had him for a friend, to have been able to turn to him when times became really tough.
She sighed sadly.
Would Ben Cole still want to be her friend when he found out what she had taken such care to keep secret? He would probably thank his lucky stars that he hadn’t got involved!
Her hand went to the gentle swell of her stomach concealed beneath her loose fitting T-shirt and her eyes were suddenly sad.
How many men would be interested in befriending a woman who was having someone else’s baby?
‘I WONDER if you could do me a favour?’
Anna was in the treatment room when Ben Cole tapped on the door. It was Friday morning and surgery was coming to an end. It had been a busy morning as usual, but she had thoroughly enjoyed her first week in Winton. Any qualms she’d had about her ability to do the job had soon disappeared. The work might be rather different to what she was used to but the basic procedures were the same, and she really liked the people she was working with.
All in all, Anna had decided that things were working out rather better than she had feared they would. The only cloud on the horizon was the fact that Ben Cole continued to treat her with a distant courtesy that stung. Now as she saw the chilly expression on his face she had to bite back a sigh.
‘Of course. What would you like me to do?’ she asked politely.
‘I’ve a patient with me who needs a blood test and I’d like to get it done as soon as possible. Would you have time to see her now, by any chance?’ he asked, equally politely.
‘Yes, there’s no problem. I’ve only got one more patient to see and he hasn’t arrived yet.’ Anna glanced at her watch. ‘In fact, if you send her straight in to see me then I should be able to catch the courier. He’s due in about ten minutes to collect today’s samples.’
‘Fine. The lab won’t have any excuse for not getting the results back to us early next week, then.’ Ben sounded relieved and she frowned.
‘Is it that urgent?’
‘Yes and no.’ He sighed when he saw that she didn’t understand. ‘I’ve been trying to get this woman to have a blood test for months but each time I suggest it she finds some sort of excuse. I’m not sure what the problem is, to be honest.’
‘I see. Why did she come to see you in the first place?’ Anna asked curiously, thinking that it was a strange situation.
‘She’s been suffering from night sweats and hot flushes,’ he explained. ‘She’s in her mid-forties so I did suggest that it was probably the first sign of the menopause, but she got really upset by the idea. I’m hoping that she will accept it once we get the results of the blood test, then I can start her on HRT.’
‘A lot of women find it difficult to come to terms with the fact that they are reaching that stage in their lives,’ she observed softly.
‘I know, and I’m sympathetic to how they feel, believe me. However, this patient seems unusually loath to accept the idea. She’s so adamant, in fact, that I’m starting to wonder if I’m simply opting for the easy answer.’ Ben frowned thoughtfully.
‘What?’ Anna asked impulsively. She gave a little shrug when he looked at her. ‘I can tell that you’re trying to make up your mind about something.’
He laughed and she felt a shiver run down her spine when she heard the unaccustomed warmth in his voice. ‘You’re far too perceptive, Anna. It wouldn’t be easy to pull the wool over your eyes.’
‘Oh, I’m as gullible as the next person, believe me,’ she replied, feeling the tiny stab of pain that speared her heart. She couldn’t help wishing that she hadn’t been quite so trusting in the past year. If she’d realised what would happen, would she have decided on the course she’d taken?
It was impossible to answer a question like that so she didn’t try. She looked up, feeling a ripple of apprehension run through her when she saw how Ben was looking at her.
‘That sounded as though it was spoken from the heart,’ he said quietly.
‘Probably.’ She summoned a smile, wishing that she had hidden her feelings better. The last thing she wanted was to incite his curiosity. ‘Anyway, what’s the patient’s name and what tests do you want done?’
‘Janice Robertson. Here are her notes.’ He handed her the patient’s record card. ‘I want the full works—cell count, proteins, gases, antibodies, micro-organisms, and so on. I don’t want to overlook anything just in case I’m on the wrong track. I want to get this sorted out while I have the chance.’
‘Fine. I’ll get straight onto it.’
Anna turned away, making a great production out of finding everything she needed. She breathed a little sigh of relief when she heard the door closing. She really must be more careful about what she said! Ben had obviously been suspicious just now and she didn’t want him wondering what she had to hide.
She sighed again as she took a couple of fresh vials out of a drawer for the blood samples. She was going to have to tell people about the baby at some point. Although she had managed to disguise her pregnancy so far, the time was fast approaching when she wouldn’t be able to hide it any longer. She couldn’t help worrying how the staff at the surgery were going to react when they found out. Would they be angry that she hadn’t told them before? She really couldn’t blame them if they were.
It was a sobering thought but she tried not to dwell on it as she got ready. When Janice Robertson tapped on the door a few minutes later she had everything set up.
‘Come in,’ she called, smiling reassuringly as the woman hesitantly entered the room. ‘Hello, there. I’m Anna Clemence, the new practice nurse. Dr Cole wants you to have a blood test, I believe?’
‘That’s right.’
Anna frowned when she heard the reluctance in the other woman’s voice. She couldn’t help noticing how dejected the woman looked as she ushered her to a chair. It was obvious that Janice wasn’t keen to have the test done, although, like Ben, Anna wasn’t sure what the problem was.
‘I’ve got everything ready so you just make yourself comfortable. Have you ever had a blood test before?’ she asked soothingly, picking up the webbing strap that she would use as a tourniquet while she took the sample. Maybe Janice was frightened of needles and that was why she looked so upset. She’d seen enough grown men keel over to know how the sight of a syringe could affect some people!
‘Only when I was pregnant.’ Janice suddenly smiled so that her whole face lit up. ‘They were always taking blood from me then!’
‘I can imagine!’ Anna laughed, although it was hard to hide her amazement at the transformation in the woman. ‘There’s all sorts of things that need to be checked when you’re having a baby. I bet you got fed up with all the tests.’
‘Oh, I didn’t mind,’ Janice assured her. ‘I mean, you don’t, do you? Not when it’s to make sure that your baby’s going to be healthy.’
‘No, of course not. That’s the most important thing, isn’t it?’ Anna replied, thinking how very true that was. She tightened the tourniquet around Janice’s arm then picked up the syringe. ‘Now, all you’ll feel is a little scratch. It won’t really hurt so don’t worry.’
She deftly inserted the needle into the vein then started to draw off a small amount of blood. ‘How many children do you have, by the way?’ she asked to distract her. Although Janice didn’t appear to be worried about what was happening, it seemed safer to keep her talking.
‘Two, a boy and a girl. Susan and Richard.’ Janice sighed heavily. ‘They’re both grown up now, of course. Richard works in London and Susan is taking a gap year between finishing university and finding a job. She’s in Australia at the moment.’
Anna snapped the end off the vial and quickly filled in the label with the patient’s name, address, date of birth and the address code for the surgery. She picked up a second vial, knowing that the lab would require two samples to complete all the tests Ben had requested.
‘You must miss them,’ she observed, drawing off the second vial of blood.
‘I do. The house seems so empty without them. I don’t know what to do with myself most days. Alan—that’s my husband—is always at work, you see. He’s a builder and he has his own business. He’s been so busy recently that he’s gone from early morning until late at night. I’m on my own most of the time and it gets very lonely.’
Janice tried to smile but Anna could see the tears that had welled into her eyes. She frowned as she pressed a small adhesive dressing over the puncture mark in the crook of the woman’s elbow.
Could it be that some of Janice’s problems stemmed from loneliness? she wondered. Ben had seemed to think that it was more than just the physical signs of the menopause that were troubling her so it just seemed to fit. Although loneliness wasn’t an illness in itself, it often led to depression and that could cause a variety of symptoms ranging from mild anxiety to hallucinations in extreme cases.
‘It must do,’ Anna said sympathetically, making a note to mention it to him. ‘When you’ve been used to rushing around, looking after a family, it must be strange to have all that free time on your hands. Do you go out to work?’
‘No. I always stayed at home to look after the children. Alan’s business has done very well so we didn’t need the extra money, and he’s never liked the idea of me working. Anyway, I can’t see anyone wanting to employ me now, not at my age and with no real experience to offer.’
‘How about voluntary work?’ Anna suggested thoughtfully. It was obvious that staying in the house on her own all day wasn’t doing Janice any good, and there had to be a solution. ‘A lot of charities are crying out for people to help them. Or what about helping out at the local playgroup? I’m sure they’d be thrilled to have someone with your experience.’
‘Do you think so?’ Janice said eagerly. ‘I’d never given it a thought, to be honest, but it would be lovely to be around small children again. I loved it when my two were toddlers. It was the happiest time of my life.’
‘I’m almost certain there’s a notice on the board in the foyer for the local playgroup,’ Anna told her, delighted to see the woman looking so much more animated. ‘Why don’t we take a look? There might be a phone number you could call. You could have a chat with whoever runs the group and see how they would feel about you helping.’
She led the way through the waiting room, holding open the door while Janice followed her into the foyer. The notice-board was covered with posters advertising various events that were due to take place in the town but she soon spotted the one she wanted.
‘There it is. And they’ve given the name and the telephone number of the lady who runs the playgroup. I’ll just fetch a pen and some paper then you can jot down the details.’
Anna hurried back inside and went straight to the reception desk. Eileen had just finished taking a phone call and she looked up when Anna approached her. ‘Problems?’
‘Not really. I just need a pen and a scrap of paper if you’ve got one handy.’
Eileen found them for her. ‘Anything else?’
‘No, that’s fine. Thanks,’ Anna assured her. She went back to the foyer and quickly noted down the details for Janice then handed her the slip of paper. ‘Now, promise me that you’ll give them a call. There’s no point letting your talents go to waste.’
Janice laughed delightedly. ‘Oh, wouldn’t it be wonderful if they said I could help out? I’ll phone them as soon as I get home.’
‘You do that,’ Anna agreed, smiling to herself as she watched her leave. The difference in Janice’s demeanour was simply amazing, she thought.
‘What have you been doing to make Janice Robertson look so cheerful all of a sudden?’
She swung round when she heard Ben’s voice, feeling a little flurry run through her when she found him standing in the doorway. ‘I just suggested that she should contact the local playgroup and see if they need any volunteers to help them.’ She quickly repeated what the woman had told her. ‘I got the impression that she was lonely and thought that this might be just what she needed.’
‘I see.’ He suddenly smiled at her. ‘Maybe I should ask you for help more often.’
Anna laughed but she couldn’t deny how good it felt to have him looking at her without that awful chill in his eyes for once. It struck her how much it had hurt to have him treat her so distantly all week.
‘I’m only too happy to help any time I can,’ she assured him huskily, rather surprised by the idea.
Ben took a deep breath and even as she watched the warmth faded from his face. ‘So long as it’s within working hours and strictly inside the terms of your contract, of course.’
She shrugged, feeling deeply hurt that he should have seen fit to remind her at that precise moment about what she had said. ‘I don’t imagine I’m any different to you or Adam in that respect. We all need a life outside working hours.’
‘I’m sure you’re right.’ His tone was cool now. ‘Anyway, well done. I’ve had my suspicions that Janice was suffering from mild depression as much as anything else. Let’s hope that your idea has done the trick. Sometimes all it needs is for a person to be pointed in the right direction.’
He went back inside and she saw him go over to speak to Eileen. Anna heard the receptionist laugh at something he said as she went back into the waiting room, but she didn’t go over to find out what the joke was. She doubted if Ben would have wanted to share it with her, anyway.
That thought hurt far more than it should have done. Anna deliberately put it out of her mind as she went back to her room and packed up the samples ready for collection. The courier arrived a short time later, closely followed by her last patient, so she had no time to brood.
The rest of the day flew past with barely a minute to breathe, let alone worry about anything other than making sure that she did everything right. However, as she got ready for bed that night Anna found herself thinking about what Ben had said to her.
Maybe it was her imagination but there had seemed to be a hint of regret in Ben’s voice as he’d reminded her of her decision to keep her working life and her professional one strictly separate. If she hadn’t known better, she might even think that he was hurt rather angry about her refusal to have lunch with him the previous week.
She rolled over and closed her eyes, willing the thought from her mind. She didn’t like to think of Ben being hurt, funnily enough.
Saturday arrived and Anna got up early. She had the flat cleaned and her washing done by eleven o’clock. She decided that she would go into town and do some shopping because she’d bought only the barest necessities the previous week.
She sighed as she found her thoughts immediately returning to Ben once again—she had to stop thinking about him all the time! She had made the right decision and there was no point harping on about it. She would be polite and friendly within the limits of their working relationship, but that was all. There was no point in wishing that she had handled things differently and certainly no point in wishing that she hadn’t rebuffed him!
She slipped on a lightweight jacket over her jeans and T-shirt then left the flat. The forecast was for rain later in the day but she was planning on being back well before then. She ran down the steps but paused when she saw Adam Knight, the senior partner, crossing the car park.
‘End of another busy week,’ he commented, stopping to speak to her. ‘How have you enjoyed it, Anna? It’s not been too big a change for you?’
Anna smiled when she saw the kindly concern on his face. She had spoken to Adam several times during the week and had found him extremely helpful on each occasion. He had a quiet confidence and authority that inspired respect in everyone who came into contact with him. She found herself thinking how like Ben he was in that regard before she realised where her thoughts were wandering once more.
‘I’ve really enjoyed it,’ she said quickly, focusing firmly on the conversation. ‘It’s been a bit strange at times but the routine procedures are the same wherever you work.’
‘Well, I have to say that we’ve been very glad to have you here. I was saying to Ben yesterday that we would have been hard pressed to cope if you hadn’t taken the job.’ Adam smiled warmly at her. ‘We were extremely fortunate to get someone of your calibre for the post.’
‘I was glad to be offered it,’ she said sincerely, although she couldn’t help feeling guilty. She was very much aware of how differently Adam might feel when he found out that she was pregnant. Maybe she hadn’t been obliged to tell him before she had accepted the job, but most employers would have expected to have been told in advance. It was just that she had been so desperate to get the job that she had felt that she’d had no choice.
She took a deep breath, wondering if it would be best to tell him now and get it over with. Adam had had a week to see that she was capable of doing the work so surely that would go in her favour? Even though he might be upset about her oversight, she didn’t think from what she knew of him that he would go so far as to sack her.
Would he?
It was that last thought which made her hesitate, and before she could make up her mind what to do he glanced at his watch.
‘I’d better get a move on. I’ve had strict instructions not to be late.’ He grimaced. ‘Beth has invited my aunt and uncle to stay for the weekend and she wants me there to give her a hand, getting everything ready. You’d think we had royalty visiting from all the preparations she’s been making!’
Anna smiled at his wry tone, hating herself for feeling so relieved at having an excuse to put off her confession a little longer. ‘I expect she wants everything to be just right.’
‘So she keeps telling me,’ he agreed drolly, then suddenly smiled. ‘Actually, things couldn’t be any more perfect. I didn’t know what I’d been missing all my life until I met Beth.’
Anna sighed as he sketched her a wave and got into his car. It must be wonderful to feel like that about someone, to love and be loved in return, to have someone beside you to face all life’s problems. Unbidden, a picture of Ben Cole’s handsome face sprang to mind and she frowned. Why on earth had she thought about Ben in that context?
It was all very strange but she tried not to think about it as she walked into town. She went straight to the supermarket but it was crowded with shoppers that day. It took her far longer than she’d expected to collect what she needed then she had to wait ages in the queue at the checkout. By the time she left the store, there were huge black clouds gathering overhead and the first few spots of rain were starting to fall.
Anna sighed as she took a firmer grip on the heavy carrier bags. She would have dearly loved to have taken a taxi but she simply didn’t have the money for that kind of luxury. It looked as though she was going to get very, very wet!
She was halfway home when the heavens opened and the rain started to fall with a vengeance. She stopped and looked around for somewhere to shelter. She spotted the entrance to the park and wondered fleetingly if there might be somewhere there where she could wait out the storm. However, she soon decided that it would be a waste of time going to take a look when she saw a jogger running briskly out of the gates. Surely even the most ardent keep-fit fanatic wouldn’t choose to run round in a torrential downpour if there was anywhere to shelter!
She had set off again, moving closer to the wall, when she heard footsteps pounding along the pavement behind her. Having her head bowed against the rain, she didn’t notice the runner drawing alongside her. She nearly jumped out of her skin when a familiar voice spoke in her ear.
‘Here, give me some of those bags. It will be quicker if we both carry them.’
She swung round, unable to hide her surprise when she saw who it was. ‘Ben! What are you doing here?’
‘I certainly wasn’t following you, if that’s what you’re wondering. I happened to see you as I came out of the park.’ He gave her a grim smile and she felt herself flush.
‘I never thought you were following me,’ she denied hotly, glaring at him, then felt her anger get hijacked along the way when she suddenly realised what he was wearing, which was remarkably little, quite frankly.
Anna took a deep breath but it was impossible to control the sudden lurch her pulse gave as her eyes swept down the length of his body. The outfit that Ben had on was perfectly appropriate for what he had been doing. However, there was little doubt in her mind that the sight of his muscular body clad only in those brief, black running shorts and vest would have had an effect on even the sternest female heart!
She quickly averted her gaze, terrified that he would guess what was going through her mind. She wasn’t a prude by any means, but was it really right to have been dwelling on the length and shape of his powerful legs with such enjoyment? Should she have been deriving such pleasure from studying the narrowness of his hips and waist? Or gaining so much satisfaction from gazing at those gleaming wet pectoral muscles? She didn’t think so!
‘Come on, Anna. Do you want a hand with those bags or not? It’s up to you.’
She blinked when she heard the impatience in his voice. ‘I…hum…’
It was on the tip of her tongue to refuse when Ben took the decision from her. ‘We’ll both end up with pneumonia if we stand here much longer while you try to decide if you can trust me,’ he snapped, taking most of the shopping bags from her.
‘Trust you?’ she said uncertainly.
‘Uh-huh.’ He held up his hand as though he were swearing an oath. ‘I promise on my honour that this isn’t a ploy to get you back to your flat and have my wicked way with you. I just wanted to help you, although I’m beginning to wish that I’d curbed my Boy Scout instincts.’
Anna blushed hotly. The worst thing was that she couldn’t think of a word to say in her own defence. Fortunately, Ben didn’t wait around to hear her reply. He set off up the road at a fast lope, leaving her to trail after him, miserably aware that she had made a fool of herself. Even though she hadn’t imagined for a second that he had been planning to have his ‘wicked way’ with her, there was no way on earth that she could have explained what had been going through her mind!
They walked back to the flat in total silence. Ben kept a couple of steps ahead of her all the way, giving her no opportunity to say anything even if she’d wanted to. He paused at the bottom of the steps leading up to the flat. ‘Leave the shopping here and I’ll bring it up. You go and unlock the door.’
Anna just managed to stop herself saluting when she heard the imperious note in his voice. However, it didn’t seem worth promoting an argument. She ran up the steps and opened the door, moving aside so that he could carry the shopping bags inside.
He plonked them on the kitchen table then turned to leave. ‘That’s it, then. I’ll see you on Monday.’
‘Wait!’ Anna didn’t know where that word had sprung from. She certainly hadn’t been intending to say it. She shrugged when he looked at her, seeing the chill in his dark eyes, and couldn’t help wishing that she could do something to repair the damage that she had caused the previous Saturday, but she didn’t know how to go about it.
Pulsuz fraqment bitdi.