Dear Reader,
I’m embarrassed to say this story began with one simple idea. I wanted a love scene under a waterfall.
I mentioned this to my Romance Book Club members and one of them, who’d just returned from a trip, said, “There are plenty of waterfalls in Hawaii.”
At the time, I’d just finished writing Primal Calling, set in the coldest part of Alaska, and I was ready for some sunny tropical weather. How simple, right? But, I hope I made up for it with my characters. A discussion at Book Club around that time was about a breast cancer survivor, and immediately a character started forming in my mind.
The heroine—a breast cancer survivor—and the hero, an Army Captain with PTSD, are definitely dark subjects, and not necessarily conducive to romance. But then, if there’s anything I believe in, it’s the power of love. Love for self, love for family members, and even love for a lonely man haunted by guilt. Love can make you a better person, love can give you the strength to overcome adversity, and love can heal a scarred soul. I hope you enjoy Kristen’s and Luke’s struggle to love each other and let that love heal what was once broken.
I so enjoy hearing from readers. You can reach me through my website www.jillianburns.com and while you’re there check out my latest news and future releases.
Jillian Burns
JILLIAN BURNS has always read romance, and spent her teens immersed in the worlds of Jane Eyre and Elizabeth Bennet. She lives in Texas with her husband of twenty years and their three active kids. Jillian likes to think her emotional nature—sometimes referred to as moodiness—has found the perfect outlet in writing stories filled with passion and romance. She believes romance novels have the power to change lives with their message of eternal love and hope.
This book is dedicated to all US service members
with Post-Traumatic Stress Syndrome. You are not
alone and your country owes you a debt of gratitude.
This story wouldn’t have happened without my
wonderful Romance Book Club friends
Deb, Kelley, and Arline!
I owe my SCUBA information to my god-daughter,
Jennifer, my sanity to my two critique partners
extraordinaire, Pam and Linda, and my clean
laundry to my heroic husband, who never complains
about my deadline craziness. I also need to express
deep gratitude to my editor, Kathryn.
“CALL 9-1-1!” KRISTEN TURNER yelled at the gathering crowd.
A piercing scream wasn’t all that unusual at the Tradewinds Bar and Grill late at night, except this scream had come from a gray-haired woman in a flowered muumuu, and the paunchy older gentleman beside her was flailing about, his face as red-and-purple-mottled as a Maui sunset.
The man was choking.
Kristen knew how to do the Heimlich—in theory—but getting her arms around this nice, but rather barrel-chested man, might be tough.
Before she could move behind him, a tall, dark-haired man swooped in, wrapped his long, muscular arms around the man and administered the Heimlich so perfectly, the chunk of BBQ chicken wing flew out of the older man’s throat and landed on the table.
The crowd applauded and whistled, but the mystery hero slowly lowered the older man to the floor and put his ear to the man’s chest.
The older man’s eyes were closed and the mystery man began performing CPR on him. He gave four harsh pumps to the man’s chest, and then held the man’s nose shut and breathed into his mouth a couple of times. Another four strong pushes on the chest, and another set of mouth-to-mouths.
Oblivious to the crowd around him, the guy worked tirelessly. Kristen could see beads of sweat rolling down his temple as he put everything he had into saving the other man’s life.
The wail of sirens approached and then paramedics elbowed their way through the crowd and knelt beside the fallen man. But just as they got out their equipment, the mystery hero stopped pumping and the older man drew in a quick breath and opened his eyes. The wife was hysterical as she hugged her husband. One of the paramedics eased her away while the other examined her husband.
They put on a blood-pressure cuff and stuck some round pads, attached to wires, on his chest and started an IV, but … the old man was already conscious and talking. If it hadn’t been for the mystery man this night might have turned out quite differently.
Hairs on Kristen’s arms stood up and the goose bumps made her shiver.
The wife asked about the mystery man, wanted to thank him, and everyone looked around, but he’d disappeared.
The older gentleman was rolled away on a gurney, his wife trotting alongside him, holding his hand, and the rest of the customers went back to their tables and drinks. The Beach Boys’ “Surfin’ Safari” boomed through the speakers, and some tables raised their glasses in a toast to the “stranger who saved the day.”
Rubbing her arms, Kristen leaned in the doorway and stared after the ambulance as it drove away. Then she scanned the road both ways and the area all around the Tradewinds. But there was no sign of the mystery man, as she’d begun thinking of him. Who did that kind of thing in this day and age? Didn’t the guy want his fifteen minutes of fame?
It seemed not. The mystery man must subscribe to the comic-book code of life, where, once a hero saves the day, he flies off into the night and no one ever knows his true identity.
WITH A SHOUT, LUKE SHOT UP from his bed, blinking in the darkness until he found the green glow of the clock. 1:00 a.m. He pressed his palms to his eyes and swiped his hands through his sweat-soaked hair.
Another damned nightmare.
So much for getting any more sleep tonight.
Luke got out of bed, dropped to his stomach and counted out fifty push-ups. Then he rolled to his back, laced his fingers behind his head and did fifty crunches. After that, fifty lunges. But the images from his nightmare didn’t go away.
After a hot shower, he stepped into his jeans and padded out to the kitchen. He opened the fridge, grabbed the white carton of leftover sesame chicken and the chopsticks, and carried them out of the condo. He rode the elevator down and crossed Kihei Road to a picnic table on Kamaole Beach.
The ocean breeze cooled his dampened face and body, and the constant crash of the waves calmed his thoughts. His buddy John, back at Fort Sam Houston, had been half-right. Maui was peaceful, all right. The air here was soft, and perfumed with the sweet fragrance of tropical flowers. The palm trees swayed, and the ocean sparkled with moonlight. But the calm and quiet hadn’t stopped the nightmares.
Not yet, anyway.
He’d only been here a few days. John had generously lent him the use of his condo for the rest of Luke’s leave. Surely three more weeks of living on this island paradise would be enough to get his head straight.
A dog whined and Luke glanced in the direction of the sound. A scruffy mutt the size of a shepherd sat on his haunches staring at him. “What are you looking at?”
As if he’d understood perfectly, the dog made a point of glancing down at Luke’s Chinese food, and his tongue came out and licked his muzzle.
Aah. The guy was hungry. Okay, boy. Luke really didn’t want the rest. He set the carton down a few feet in front of him and before he’d even straightened up, the dog had lapped up what was left. He licked the container clean and then lay down with a loud sigh.
Luke bent down to retrieve the carton, turned to pitch it into the trash receptacle and stopped midpitch. Standing across the grassy slope, under the streetlight was a young woman, small and slim and wearing a white T-shirt and cutoffs. She tugged off her helmet and Luke’s heart literally jumped.
It was the girl, the waitress from the bar tonight. Had she followed him?
She crouched down to chain her bike to the rack, straightened and toed off her sneakers and then skipped down to the surf.
Her straight blond hair lifted in the gentle wind and Luke caught his breath when she raised her face and arms to the full moon, blew it a kiss and then twirled. Her smile put the moon’s glow to shame.
Before he could fully admire her slim legs she ran into the ocean. He jumped up to stop her, thinking she was crazy or suicidal. Who did that at two-thirty in the morning? But she darted back up to dry land as the waves crashed around her.
Frolicking. There was no other word for it. She was frolicking in the moonlit sea. Her laughter carried to him across the breeze and made his chest tighten. Such joy. If only she could bottle that up, he’d buy a case.
What was she doing? Was dancing in the ocean her own personal remedy for insomnia?
Maybe he was still dreaming. Wouldn’t that be cool? To be having this kind of dream and be getting a good night’s sleep while he was at it?
Not possible. His psyche could never conjure up someone so unusual. He held still, cloaked in the darkness of the tree cover, wondering what she’d do next.
As she headed back toward her bike, he swallowed and hoped she wouldn’t see him. But she was still twenty yards or more away and walked past without noticing him. Reaching her bike, she unlocked the chain, and then walked it across the street and into the foyer of his condo building.
They were neighbors?
Luke got up and headed over to the condo. The dog trotted after him and tried to slip inside the lobby door as Luke opened it.
“Hold on there, mutt.” Luke closed the door with both of them still outside. But under the bright lobby lights shining through the glass Luke saw what looked like blood, still wet, all over the dog’s left side. “What the …” He squatted to get a closer look and the dog sat, panting up at him trustingly.
Luke’s shoulders slumped. The mutt had been scraped by something. A car, a boulder, something rough. He checked for broken ribs and didn’t feel any, but the dog could have internal injuries. Still, even if he knew where a vet’s office was, it probably wouldn’t be open at two-thirty in the morning. There were gauze and bandages in the condo….
He let out an audible sigh, opened the door and ushered the dog inside the lobby and up the elevator to his condo.
He’d take him to a vet first thing tomorrow.
THE FOLLOWING EVENING, Luke lay in bed, staring at the rattan dresser across the bedroom. How did they get that wood to curlicue like that? And was the cane naturally that color or was that painted?
Nice. He’d been reduced to wondering about furniture making.
Close your eyes, Andrews. Relax. Deep breaths …
Forget it. He flipped back the sheets, swung his legs off the mattress and dropped to the floor for his usual workout.
The mutt, now bathed and bandaged, lifted his head, but otherwise remained lying on the floor at the foot of the bed.
The vet had said the dog was a shepherd mix, x-rayed it for internal injuries and found none. But he hadn’t had room to board the stray. The vet prescribed a bottle of antibiotics and directions to the nearest shelter ten miles away in Puunene. Luke planned to drop him off there in a couple of days, after the mutt healed a little more.
Tomorrow he’d have to get some dog food and some more bandages. In the meantime, no sense wasting a 60” flat screen and nine hundred channels….
LUKE JERKED AWAKE ON a choked-off shout. Geez. He’d fallen asleep in the club chair in the living room. The dog whined and stuck his cold nose under Luke’s hand. Bleary-eyed, he found the TV remote, switched off the infomercial, then stumbled to the bathroom and splashed water on his face. The dream had been different this time. Bloodier.
Feeling nauseated, he avoided the mirror above the sink and made his way to the balcony. He opened the sliding glass door and stepped out into a salty sea breeze and the reassuring sound of crashing waves.
After a couple of deep gulps of air, he leaned his forearms on the railing and stared into the night sky. There was a bottle of over-the-counter sleeping pills in the bathroom medicine cabinet. Maybe he should try one. But he should be able to deal with this without resorting to medication, damn it.
Give it time, Andrews. The advice had come from John, along with the key to his condo. And John had studied psychotherapy before switching to orthopedics.
This was only Luke’s fourth day here.
From the corner of his eye, he caught sight of that same blonde he’d seen last night pedaling her bike southbound on Kihei Road. He turned his wrist and checked his watch. Two-thirty. Again.
She dismounted and chained her bike to the rack just as she’d done the night before. She wore the same outfit, too. She turned away and headed down to the surf. As she had the night before, the blonde lifted her face and arms to the moon. Was she some sort of new-age moon worshipper?
After playing in the surf awhile she went back to her bike and walked it to the condo. Just before she entered the foyer she looked up. Without thinking, he stepped back into the shadowed doorway.
Luke held his breath. What are you doing, Andrews, you moron? So what if she knew he’d been watching her?
Should he step out to the balcony and act as if he’d just gone back inside to get something? Smile and wave as if this were just a normal meeting? But he couldn’t force his lips to curve upward. It was almost as if he’d forgotten how to smile. But it turned out it didn’t matter. When he braved the balcony again, she was gone.
KRISTEN TURNER HURRIED into the tiny bathroom of the Tradewinds Bar and Grill, wiggled out of her grass skirt and toed off her high heels.
Amy followed her in, plunked her makeup bag next to the sink and started touching up her lipstick in the mirror. “You sure are in a hurry.”
Kristen froze in the act of unzipping her backpack and shrugged. “I’m just ready to get home and put my feet up.”
With Amy’s raised brows and pursed lips, she didn’t have to say the word Riiiight out loud.
But Kristen chose to ignore her. She pulled her shorts and sneakers from her backpack and stuffed the skirt and high heels in.
“You really think you’ll see him again tonight?” Amy turned away from the mirror and waggled her brows. “Captain Mysterious?”
Kristen grinned as she tied her shoelaces. The name the bar patrons had given him had stuck and the story had spread among the staff who hadn’t been working that night.
She’d barely caught a glimpse of him on the balcony, and had half convinced herself she’d conjured him up from wishful thinking. She couldn’t believe her hero from the other night lived in her building. But she’d have recognized that angled jaw and those biceps below his white T-shirt sleeves anywhere.
“If it’s him, he probably thinks I’m some psych-ward patient if he saw me in my ‘celebrate life’ moment.”
“Nah, I bet he’s into you. He probably noticed you that night he was here. Why else would he be waiting on his balcony at that time of night?”
“Uh, ‘cause he’s a serial killer stalking his next victim? Or a vampire? Or maybe he’s a werewolf watching for the full moon?”
Amy giggled as she rummaged around in her voluminous purse and pulled out a hairbrush. “Your own personal Edward or Jacob, huh? Which does he have? Edward’s smoldering passion, or Jacob’s rock-hard abs?”
Kristen felt a tiny flurry in her stomach picturing the mystery man. “Both.” The word came out kind of breathy and Amy gave her a sharp look.
“Both? Good grief, no wonder you’re all gaga over him.”
“I’m not gaga. I just thought he was … intriguing. Leaving like that before he could be thanked.”
Amy shrugged. “Maybe he was afraid of a lawsuit. You know what they say. No good deed goes unpunished.”
“Wow. Cynical much?” Kristen worried about her friend’s hard-edged attitude toward life. “What are you getting all fixed up for?”
Turning back to the mirror, Amy ran the brush through her long red curls. Kristen’s self-esteem took a hit every time she compared her own straight ordinary hair to those luscious red curls.
“Didn’t you say Kekoa mentioned he might drop by sometime?” Amy dropped the question so offhandedly that Kristen knew it wasn’t a casual inquiry.
“The guy who drives the boat I use? He might have mentioned he liked that Sneaky Tiki you made him last time he came in to bring me his new brochures. But we have to be at the dive site by seven to beat all the tour boats. I doubt he’ll show up now.”
Amy visibly deflated, her mouth turned down. “Oh.” She dropped her brush back into her purse.
“You like him!” Kristen shoved Amy’s shoulder with her own.
Amy spun to face Kristen. “What’s not to like with that smooth, dark skin and those intelligent black eyes? And his broad chest and shoulders look like he could row a girl all the way to the Big Island if he had to. Don’t you think he’s the sexiest guy you ever met? You gotta invite me on a dive, Kris.”
Kristen winced, hating to turn her friend down. “You know I’d love to, but, Kekoa isn’t just my boat driver, he’s my dive partner, too.”
“Please?” Amy begged. “I promise not to distract him. I’ve been dying to see where you dive, anyway. And, hey, maybe you could invite Captain Mysterious along. I’ll bring my famous triple-berry muffins.”
“Okay, okay.” Kristen chuckled, holding her hands up in surrender. “I’ll ask Kekoa. Maybe we could set something up for next week sometime.”
Amy hugged Kristen. “Thanks, girlfriend. All I want is a chance.”
“You might need more than that. Kekoa’s not easy to get to know.”
“We’ll see.” Amy’s gaze slipped away and her expression softened. “He’s got a lot of passion lurking beneath the surface. I can tell.”
“Kekoa?” Kristen didn’t see it, but … whatever. “If you say so. I’m off tomorrow, so I’ll text you if it’s Monday,” she said as she left the restroom, waved to her boss and headed for her bike.
It was barely a third of a mile from the Tradewinds to her condo on South Kihei Road and she was at her building before she’d even thought about what she might say if she saw the stranger again. But then again, what kind of conversation could she have yelling up at him on his balcony?
Wanting to soak her aching feet in the warm water before heading inside, she braked at the bike rack, swung her leg over the bike, took off her helmet and attached it to a handlebar.
After going knee-deep in the surf and wiggling her toes into the soft sand, she headed back up to her bike. A dog barking to her right made her catch her breath and jump. Her gaze shot to a tan shepherd mix running toward her and the tall shadow following the dog.
Her heart pumped stronger for one beat before she recognized it was him. Captain Mysterious.
The dog reached her side and she hunkered down to let him smell her hand. He nuzzled into her chest and almost knocked her over. Catching herself with her hands behind her, she laughed as the dog tried to lick her face.
“Hey, mutt.” The dark stranger grabbed the dog and held him away so she could get to her feet. “Sorry about that.”
Kristen stood, wiping her hands on her shorts. “No worries. He’s sweet.” She smiled and looked the man in the eyes. She had to lift her gaze way up. Her five-foot-two height seemed even more petite against his six-foot frame.
He dropped his gaze and wrestled the dog into sitting. “He’s not mine.”
She hesitated. “Oh.” She stood there a second as he looked anywhere but at her. Was that a signal for go away? Or was he just shy? Is that why he’d ducked back inside his condo last night? Finally, she stuck out her right hand. “I’m Kristen Turner.”
He cleared his throat and finally met her gaze. Kristen’s pulse fluttered. His eyes. Their deep brown color seemed to bear all the emotions his face refused to acknowledge. Despair. Dismissal. And hope. The despair drew her. The dismissal challenged her. And the hope cinched the deal.
“Luke Andrews.” He let go of the dog, who he’d been gently petting, and slid his hand into hers. Heat. Energy. Smooth skin. Long, slim fingers. She held on, not wanting to let whatever was passing between their hands go just yet.
He pulled his hand away.
Did he remember her from the other night? Was that why he was acting so on edge? Only one way to find out.
“I just got off work. I’m a cocktail waitress at the Tradewinds down the road. I … saw you save that man the other night.”
He glanced up at her with apprehension lining his forehead.
“Don’t worry. I’m not going to give away your secret identity.”
He tilted his head, looking confused.
She waved a hand. “You know, the whole save a life and then disappear thing?”
“Oh.” He stuck his hands in his back pockets and dropped his gaze to the grass, studying it intently.
“Anyway, if you come back sometime, my manager would love to comp you a meal. We have great chicken wings.” She smiled. “And they’re usually safe to eat.”
One dark brow rose at that, but at least he wasn’t staring at the grass anymore. “Maybe I’ll try it sometime.”
“So, you work nights, too?”
She thought she heard a grunt as he spun at the waist to locate his dog, who’d trotted down to the beach and was sniffing at something in the sand. “You might say that. But I’m on vacation right now.”
“Oh.” She nodded and the nodding turned into a slow head bobbing. Her gaze moved out to the ocean. Was he trying to be mysterious? Or was he trying to get her to leave him alone? “Well, I guess I should leave you to—”
“I’ve only been here a few days, so … Can you recommend any sights I shouldn’t miss?”
“Well, there’s the Maui Ocean Center.”
He nodded. “Okay.”
“And Mount Haleakala. It’s over ten thousand feet.”
“Sounds ambitious.”
She grinned. “And, of course, the humpbacks.”
“Excuse me?”
“The whales. You’re lucky to be here in February. Their favorite breeding ground is just off the coast of Maui this time of year.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, there’re several cruises that take tourists out to see them.”
“Humpbacks.”
“Of course, you’d have to put on your thick glasses and slump your shoulders for that.” She grinned.
His brows drew together and he blinked.
Her smile slowly faded. “You know, the superhero? When he wore his glasses he was the unassuming …”
He squinted at her. “Are you comparing me to a superhero?”
She rolled her eyes. “Like, duh! You’re Captain Mysterious. Able to perform the Heimlich and CPR all in a single bound!”
“Oh, no.” Shaking his head, he rubbed his forehead. “You have a moniker for me?”
Wishing she’d kept her mouth shut now, Kristen nodded. “Well, it wasn’t me. Everyone in the bar—”
“The whole bar was talking about me?” His eyes were wide. This wasn’t going the way she’d planned.
Maybe she should rethink her idea. Even if he were interested in her, she only had a few weeks before she had to return to San Diego and resume her real life.
But in the two months she’d been here she hadn’t met any other guy she’d felt so drawn to. There was something about him. Something dark she recognized from her worst days in the hospital.
And she’d promised herself at her last doctor’s appointment that, from that moment on, she’d live life to the fullest. And that meant sometimes taking risks.
So, maybe he’d tell her to get lost. After what she’d lived through? She could handle a little rejection.
Decided, she drew a deep breath. “You know … just a bit farther from Tradewinds is a great seafood place I’ve been wanting to try. But I hate going to a restaurant alone, don’t you? If you like seafood, maybe we could go together sometime.”
The crashing of the waves seemed louder in the long silence. Then he switched his gaze out to sea. “Uh, I’m not really good company right now.”
Ouch. The fact that his answer stung a bit told her she really hadn’t been prepared for rejection. Seems her glass-half-full attitude needed a reality check. “Okay.” She nodded and waved a hand, took a step back, and then another, her sneakers sinking into the sand. “No worries.”
She spun on her heels and jogged up to the street, yanked her bike from the rack and wheeled it across Kihei Road and into the foyer of the condominium building. Her cheeks were on fire, half embarrassed, half mad that she’d made a fool of herself. Boy, had she misread the signals.
Digging in her backpack, she pulled out her mailbox key, mumbling to herself, wanting to smack her forehead. “What an idiot. You just had to go up to a complete stranger, didn’t you?” She inserted her key, yanked open the door and pulled out her mail. “Why do I do this to myself? I never learn—”
“Kristen?”
She jumped and gave a tiny shriek as she swiveled to face the voice. “Luke!” She pressed a hand to her chest and gulped. “Geez, you scared me.”
“Sorry about that.” He winced and reached up a hand to rub the back of his neck. Her gaze was drawn to his bicep, which was clearly familiar with a set of weights.
Then he lowered his arm and she took in the rest of him in the bright light of the lobby.
Except for his broad shoulders, he was fairly slim. Did he scuba dive? He had the perfect swimmer’s body. His taut abs showed beneath his tight T-shirt and so did what looked like a set of dog tags on a long chain. Military?
“Listen, can we start over?” His voice was smooth and yet rough. Not terribly deep, but not too high either. And she picked up a trace of a Southern drawl in his accent. Possibly Texan.
It was her turn to blink at him. “Uh, sure.”
A tiny smile curved the edges of his mouth. “Seafood sounds good. Tomorrow? Around seven? Meet you here?”
She smiled and nodded, feeling euphoric, as if she’d already won the Geographic Universe photography contest. “As it happens, I’m off tomorrow, uh, you mean later today, right? Seven’s good. How about we meet at the picnic table?”
He shook his head, then stopped and nodded with a small smile. “Uh, yes, today, this evening.” He stared into her eyes and his jaw shifted to the left just a fraction.
Mesmerized, Kristen could’ve stood there forever noting every nuance of his face, absorbing him. But he bent down and picked up her keys, offering them to her. “You dropped these.”
“Oh.” She hadn’t even noticed. “Thank you.” She took them from his outstretched palm and the same energy tingled her fingers as before. Maybe he felt it, too, because he glanced down at his hand and then back up at her, his dark eyes questioning.
“Looking forward to tomorrow, Luke.” She dropped the keys into her pocket. “Good night.”
He gave her a smile that was more of a grimace and waved a hand. “Good night.”
She turned for the elevator, but peeked back in time to catch him checking her out. She smiled all the way to her condo.
Pulsuz fraqment bitdi.