Enigma
Carla Cassidy
Cover
Title Page
About the Author
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Epilogue
Copyright
CARLA CASSIDY is an award-winning author who has written more than fifty novels. In 1998, she also won a Career Achievement Award for Best Innovative Series from RT Book Reviews.
Carla believes the only thing better than curling up with a good book to read is sitting down at the computer with a good story to write. She’s looking forward to writing many more books and bringing hours of pleasure to readers.
The hospital room was dimly lit and silent except for the faint voices coming from the television mounted on the wall opposite the bed.
Willa Tyler had insisted that the television be on day and night in the room despite the fact that the man in the bed had been in a coma for the past six months. She liked to believe that somewhere in the sleeping recesses of his mind he might hear the sound of laughter from a sitcom and want to join the fun.
Even though it was late and she was officially off duty, she always made his room her last stop before heading home.
She moved silently into the room and for a moment just stood and looked at him. He was something of a miracle patient. He’d been found on the side of the road, more dead than alive after having been hit by a drunk driver.
Nobody had expected him to live through that first night, but he’d hung on and over the past six months all his physical injuries had healed. But his mind remained asleep and Willa was beginning to wonder if he’d ever wake up again.
“I figured you’d be in here.”
Willa turned around and smiled at Nancy Baker, her supervisor. “I wanted to check his vitals one last time before I headed home.”
“Girl, you should be spending your time off getting to know some of the handsome bachelors that Grand Forks, North Dakota, has to offer instead of in here with a man who can’t even talk to you.”
Willa smiled. “Eventually maybe I’ll meet some of those bachelors, but in the meantime I’ve got a date tonight with a good mattress and it’s quite possible I’ll be there until noon tomorrow.”
Nancy smiled. “That sounds good, but you need a little fun in your life, Willa. You’re much too pretty and young to spend all your time here at the hospital or in your bed alone. Enjoy your time off and I’ll see you Monday morning.”
As she disappeared from the doorway Willa approached the man in the bed. He was a bit thin with black hair cut short. She knew that beneath his long-lashed lids, his eyes were a startling blue …but only because she’d been standing next to the doctor when he’d checked John Doe’s pupils on a number of occasions.
His features were sharply defined. He had a strong, straight nose, lips that looked as if they might be soft and a firm and slightly square chin. Definitely a handsome man. The doctor had guessed him to be in his late twenties or early thirties.
With a small sigh, Willa checked his vitals, pleased to find them all normal. Nancy had said she shouldn’t be spending her free time with a man who couldn’t talk to her, but whenever Willa was near John Doe she felt a strange connection to him.
There were moments she imagined she could hear his deep voice in her head, softly whispering her name. It was crazy and she assumed it was because she’d been his nurse for so long.
As a trauma nurse she rarely had long-term care of any patient, but from the moment John Doe had been brought in she’d fought to be part of the team working to keep him alive.
With his vital signs checked there was really nothing more for her to do, but still she lingered next to him. “I wish you’d wake up,” she said softly. “You’ve been sleeping for a very long time.”
She fought the impulse to run her hand across his jaw, to gently touch the lips that looked so soft. Instead she straightened the sheet that covered him. “I hope at least you’re having pleasant dreams,” she whispered close to his ear.
Thank you.
The two simple words burst into her head. Wistful thinking, she thought. She often imagined his voice in her head, thanking her for taking care of him, for talking and spending time with him.
Exhausted from the long day, knowing there was nothing more she could do for him, Willa left his room and headed for the hospital exit.
The warm April night air held a hint of the smell of newly budded flowers and sweet spring grass, a welcome change from the antiseptic scent of the hospital.
She’d only been in Grand Forks, North Dakota, for a year now. She’d moved here from Kansas City following the painful breakup with a man she thought she’d eventually marry.
Pulling her keys from her purse as she approached her car, she shoved thoughts of Paul out of her head. Water under the bridge, she told herself. She’d come here for a fresh start and so far she was pleased with the life she was carving out. She tried not to think about the loneliness that often haunted her.
It took her exactly five minutes to get to the small but cozy house she’d bought when she’d first moved here. Once inside she threw her keys on the kitchen table, pulled the ponytail holder from her shoulder-length blond hair and unbuttoned the top of her pink scrub.
A shower, then bed, she thought. Her feet ached and she was bone weary. She passed through the living room, with its warm earth-tone colors, and into her bedroom.
The double-size bed called to her, but she knew a nice hot shower would unkink tight muscles and make her sleep better. It was far too early on a Friday night to be going to bed, but after a week of long hours she had no desire to stay up.
Within minutes she was naked and standing in the shower beneath a hot spray of water. She loved her work, but there was no question that it could be tense and exhausting. Friday nights she was always ready for a couple of days off.
“The next two days are your own,” she muttered to herself as she stepped out of the shower and grabbed the awaiting fluffy towel.
Most of her days off since moving here had been spent working on the house. She’d painted walls, sanded woodwork and had even managed to install a new black sink to replace the old stained white one in the kitchen.
She slid her red silk nightgown over her head and left the bathroom, deciding to forbid herself to work on the house during the next two days. She’d find a park and take a walk, maybe go to the library for some new books to read.
She frowned. Nancy would disapprove of a solitary walk or curling up with a book as pastimes. But Nancy hadn’t had her heart broken by a snake named Paul.
Willa would love to have somebody special in her life, but the next time she’d expect more. She wouldn’t settle for a man who held tight to his own heart, who refused to share all the pieces of himself as she shared hers.
She’d make sure he was old enough to have sown all his wild oats and yet young enough, exciting enough, to make her heart beat fast.
Until the moment Paul had broken up with her she hadn’t realized that she’d been the one who had done all the giving in the relationship and he had done nothing but take. She hadn’t seen the relationship unraveling, hadn’t seen the end coming until it was upon her.
She turned on her bedside lamp, then turned off the overhead light and slid into bed, her tired bones melting into the comfortable mattress.
This was one of the loneliest times of the day for her, when she got home from work and had nobody to talk to, nobody to share the events of her day.
Other than her coworkers at the hospital she hadn’t made new friends. Willa didn’t remember her father, who had walked out on her and her mother when she’d been four, and her mother had passed away five years ago after a long battle with cancer.
Sometimes she thought that the reason she’d stayed with Paul was simply because she hadn’t wanted to acknowledge just how alone she was in the world.
You’re not alone.
The deep voice whispered in her head and brought with it a measure of comfort. This time she didn’t question where the voice came from, only that occasionally it was there.
The first time she’d heard it, about four months ago, she’d thought maybe it was a memory of the voice of her father. Then she’d decided that it was the voice of her patient John Doe. In truth she figured it was probably nothing more than a crazy manifestation of her own loneliness.
She reached up and turned off her lamp, plunging the room into semidarkness as a sliver of illumination from the streetlamp outside drifted into the partially closed curtains. Sleep edged in quickly and she closed her eyes, giving in to it without a fight.
He came out of the darkness, first a tall, lean shadow in her room, then as the light found his face she recognized him as the man she knew as John Doe.
Somewhere in the strange world of slumber, she knew it was a dream, but it felt more real than anything she’d experienced in a very long time.
“You,” she whispered. He wore a pair of hospital pants, the pale blue cotton material hanging low on his lean hips. “John.”
It didn’t occur to her to be afraid as he moved closer. “Not John. My name is Jared,” he said. His voice was as deep and rich as she’d imagined it would be.
He sat at the bottom of the bed and reached beneath the blankets and captured one of her feet in his hand. “Your feet hurt,” he said and began to massage her with his warm hands. “You’ve been on them all day.”
“How did you know?” she asked as rivulets of warmth raced up her legs at his touch.
He smiled. “I know.” His smile was sexy and warmed the blue of his eyes and softened his bold features.
As he reached for her other foot, she thought of all the things she wanted to ask him, but as his hands moved up to her calves and he caressed with slow hot fingers, all her questions fled from her mind.
She didn’t want to talk, she just wanted to enjoy this dream of him with her, touching her. When he’d finished stroking her legs, he moved from the foot of the bed to stretch out beside her.
He rose up over her, his blue eyes flaming with desire as he took her lips with his in a kiss that stole her breath with its ravenous hunger.
She met his tongue with hers, loving the taste of him, the scent of him that filled the air. He didn’t smell like the hospital; rather he smelled like a fresh clean breeze and a hot, hungry male.
His hands were hot against her silk gown as he stroked down the length of her body. He cupped her breasts through the material and her body responded, arching up to him, wanting more …more.
It was crazy. It was wild, and within minutes he’d removed her nightgown and his mouth moved to capture one of her nipples.
He raised his head to look at her. “You are so beautiful. You’ve taken such good care of me. I want you, I want to give to you.”
His mouth captured hers once again and she was lost in him, in the dream that spun wildly out of control as they made love ….
She came awake with a sharp gasp and for a moment was shocked to find herself alone in the bed with her nightgown still on. Glancing around the room, she assured herself that no sexy man stood in the shadows.
“Wow,” she muttered aloud and reached to turn on her lamp. She sat up and looked around once again, half expecting John Doe to be sitting in the chair in the corner, or leaning against the wall next to her bed. It had been so real. She’d never had a dream that had felt so real.
A glance at her clock let her know it was just after midnight. Her heart still beat with a quickened rhythm. What a dream. She’d never experienced anything as erotic, as wonderful, before. She still felt the sweet sensations his caresses had evoked, still burned with the fire of desire.
She ran a hand though her hair and realized that falling back to sleep immediately wasn’t an option. Her heart still beat too fast and she definitely needed something cold to drink.
Drawing a deep breath, she swung her legs over the side of the bed and stood, surprised that her body continued to tingle with the residual sensations of his touch.
It had felt so real and in that moment of abrupt awakeness she’d been disappointed to realize it had just been a crazy dream. Maybe Nancy was right and she did need a boyfriend, she thought.
She left her bedroom and walked through the living room to the kitchen, still reeling from the vision of John Doe in her bed. She grabbed a glass from the cabinet and filled it with cold water. She raised it to her lips.
Help me!
The voice thundered. With a startled gasp she dropped the glass. It hit the edge of the sink and shattered into pieces.
She whirled around from the sink and stared around the kitchen, but there was nobody there. She pressed her hands on either side of her head, wondering if she were losing her mind.
She drew a deep steadying breath and cleaned up the broken glass, careful not to cut herself as she removed the shards from the sink. First the dream and now the voice—his voice inside her head.
What was wrong with her? She leaned against the counter and an urgent tension built up inside her.
You must come to the hospital, Willa. I need you!
She reeled away from the counter as the voice resounded again. Danger. She heard it in the deep timbre of his voice, in the desperate command.
She had to go. She knew it was crazy, but as anxiety pressed tight against her chest she knew she’d never be able to go back to sleep without going to the hospital and checking in on John Doe.
Leaving the kitchen, she raced into her bedroom and pulled a pair of jeans from her dresser drawer. She tugged them on, then grabbed her bra and a light blue sweatshirt and pulled them on, as well.
She had seven hundred dollars tucked into a sock in her drawer. Her mother had always told her to keep a little mad money in the house in case of an emergency.
“Losing your mind is definitely an emergency,” Willa muttered as she pulled the bills from her sock and shoved them into the back pocket of her jeans.
As she grabbed her keys from the table and headed outside she wondered if he was dying. She’d heard of strange stories like this, people appearing to other people in visions or dreams just before they passed away. Of course, she’d never heard of one of those apparitions making wild, passionate love to somebody.
The only other explanation was that she really had truly lost her mind.
The night air was chilly and she was grateful for the warmth of the sweatshirt as she got into her car and started the engine.
Hurry! Please hurry.
“I’m doing the best I can,” she muttered as she backed out of the driveway. Maybe she should just hurry and check into a psych ward because if she told anybody about this they would definitely think she was nuts. At the moment she would probably agree with them.
Jared. In her dream he’d said his name was Jared. How had her imagination come up with that name? She’d never met anyone named Jared in her life.
She pulled in to the hospital parking lot and the urgency that she’d felt before screamed inside her. She parked and ran for the hospital entrance.
At this time of night the hallways were silent and dim. She hoped she didn’t run in to anyone. She didn’t want to try to explain what she was doing here.
With each step she took she felt more ridiculous. What was she doing? She was an intelligent, rational human being following a phantom voice in her head in the middle of the night.
Her footsteps slowed as the reality of what she was doing sank in. This was insane. John Doe was in a coma. He couldn’t be asking for her help. She’d had a dream and somehow her mind had gotten all scrambled.
Willa! Hurry!
Once again the voice exploded in her head. Urgent. Frantic. And Willa couldn’t ignore the sense of alarm that raced through her blood.
She ran to his room and stopped short in the doorway. He lay on the bed just as he had been when she’d left earlier. His eyes were closed, his breathing regular, and aside from feeling like a fool, she felt ridiculously disappointed.
She drew a deep breath to still the race of her heart and moved to his side. His eyes snapped open and she gasped as he grabbed her hand with a firm grip.
“Willa.” His deep voice whispered her name as his intense blue eyes bored into hers. “You have to get me out of here. They’re going to kill me if you don’t.”
Willa’s face was as pale as the sheet that covered him and her eyes were wide and a curious blend of gray and green as she stared at him.
Jared Maddox knew he’d shocked her, first by the fact that he was conscious and second by his intense plea, but he didn’t have time to explain. He had to get out of here immediately.
He would have walked out on his own, but after six months in a hospital bed he knew he was as weak as a newborn and he desperately needed Willa’s help.
“Please,” he said as he tightened his fingers around her slender forearm. “You have to help me get out of here. There are people who are hunting me, men who want to destroy me, and they’re very near.”
He released his grip on her arm and sat up to swing his legs over the side of the bed. That simple movement half exhausted him.
Willa remained frozen at the side of the bed, her pretty features still radiating shock. “Willa, for God’s sake, please help me. It’s a matter of my life and death.”
As he said the words he began to rip out all the wires and tubes that had been connected to him.
“This is a bad idea,” she muttered, more to herself than to him. “You shouldn’t be leaving the hospital like this.”
“Willa, with or without your help, even if I have to crawl out of here, I have to go. Otherwise I’m a dead man.”
He wasn’t sure if it was his actions or the urgency in his voice that finally snapped her inertia. He was only grateful when she hurried to his side and helped him get the last of the wires unattached from his body.
They were getting closer—the hunters—and Jared knew if he and Willa didn’t get out of here immediately he’d be lost.
He got to his feet and would have fallen if she hadn’t supported him. His weakness shocked him. It was far worse than he’d anticipated.
“Take me anywhere,” he murmured, unmindful of the flap of the hospital gown at his back. “Just get me out of here as quickly as possible.” He threw his arm around her shoulder, hating that he had to depend on anyone, but knowing without her help he was definitely a dead man.
Even though he was focused on the danger of the moment, he couldn’t help but pick up her thoughts. They screamed in his head.
She was afraid, not so much of him but rather of what she was about to do in taking him out of the hospital. She had questions, too, about who he was and who might be after him. Was he telling the truth or was this some sort of a result of brain injury?
Now wasn’t the time for him to answer those questions and he wasn’t sure he’d ever tell her the whole truth. The last thing he wanted to do was bring danger to the woman who had been his emotional lifeline while he’d been comatose.
She didn’t say a word as she helped him to the hospital-room door. She peeked around the corner and then they left the room and entered the long, dimly lit hallway.
He could smell her, a faint floral scent that was as familiar to him as the sound of his own heartbeat. It was a scent he associated with compassion and tenderness, qualities that had been absent for all of his twenty-eight years except for the past six months.
Neither of them said a word as they slowly made their way toward the exit in the distance. Until the moment when she’d walked in to his hospital room minutes earlier, he’d had no idea what she looked like, but he knew her scent, the gentle touch of her hands, and he also knew many of her innermost thoughts.
Thankfully they encountered nobody else in the hallways. By the time they left the building Jared was beyond exhaustion. It was only sheer determination and desperation that drove him to put one foot in front of the other.
She led him to a car and helped him into the passenger seat and then he watched as she hurried around the front of the car to the other side.
He liked the way she looked. She was tall and slender with light blond hair she’d pulled back into a low ponytail. He suspected he would have thought her beautiful even if she’d been bald and weighed eight hundred pounds because he knew the beauty of her soul.
She slid behind the steering wheel and a cacophony of voices suddenly resounded in his head, the familiar voices of dangerous men. Close. They were so close and getting closer every minute.
“Please, we have to hurry,” he urged her. “We have to get away from here.”
“I must be out of my mind,” she murmured as she jammed the key into the ignition and started the engine. “Buckle up,” she demanded as she backed out of the parking space and then changed gears and raced for the hospital exit.
He fumbled with the seat belt and finally managed to get it secured around him as she wheeled out of the parking lot and onto a main road.
Within seconds the voices in his head had faded away and the urgency that had filled him since the moment he’d regained consciousness began to ebb.
He was left with an overwhelming exhaustion. It didn’t matter where she took him, at least for now he knew he was safe.
The men who hunted him would find his hospital bed empty and nobody would be able to tell them what had happened to him. If nothing else he’d bought himself some time.
“Where are you taking me?” he asked.
“My house,” she said after a moment’s hesitation. “It’s only about five minutes from here. You can’t be by yourself right now. You shouldn’t even be out of the hospital.” There was more than a little censure in her voice.
“Trust me, the hospital was the last place I needed to be.” He leaned back against the headrest and fought the weariness. What he needed more than anything at the moment was a chance to regain some strength and then he needed to try to contact his twin brother.
“You want to tell me what’s going on?” she asked as she turned down a tree-lined residential street. “How can you know somebody is after you? You’ve been in a coma for the past six months.”
He raised his head and looked at her, wondering how much he should tell her. As little as possible, he decided. “I just know,” he replied and couldn’t help the weary sigh that escaped him.
“You’re exhausted. You have no business being out of bed,” she exclaimed. “And I should have my head examined for having anything to do with all this.”
“There’s nothing wrong with your head,” he replied. “Willa, you just have to trust me.”
“How do you know my name?” She cast him a quick sideways glance and then focused back on the road.
“The same way you know mine. The same way I knew I was in danger. It’s complicated.”
She turned into the driveway of a neat ranch house and with a press of a button the garage door rose. She pulled in to the garage, then unbuckled her seat belt and turned to look at him, the only illumination the light from the garage-door opener in the ceiling of the garage.
“Are you crazy or am I?” she asked softly.
“You’re the most sane person I’ve ever known,” he replied. “Can we get inside?” He was irritated to realize he felt slightly faint.
“Of course.” She got out of the car and hurried around to his door to help him out. Once again he found himself leaning heavily against her as they walked through the door that led into a cheerful kitchen.
“On the sofa,” she commanded as they walked through the kitchen and into the living room. She guided him to the overstuffed navy sofa, where he collapsed.
“Lie down,” she said and went over to a desk where she grabbed a blood pressure cuff. “I want to check your vitals.”
“I’m fine. I just need to get my strength back.” He plucked at the gown he wore. “And I need to get some clothes.”
She said nothing as she took his blood pressure and then checked his pulse. As always he found her simplest of touches not only familiar and comforting, but also more than a little bit provocative.
He thought of what they’d shared hours earlier when he’d invaded her dreams. Hot. And wild. They’d moved together in perfect unison. It had only been a dream but it had been one of the best experiences of his life.
As she stepped back from him he noticed the faint pink of her cheeks, as if she, too, was remembering her dream. “Your vitals are all good.”
“I feel fine. I’m just incredibly tired.”
“I’ll get you a pillow and blanket. You need to rest and then in the morning you’re going to answer some questions.” As she left the living room and went down the hallway, he felt her fear, this time not just for him but of him.
She returned a moment later carrying a sheet, blanket and pillow. He stood as she efficiently made the sofa into a bed for him for the night. When she was finished he sat back down. “Willa, you don’t have to be afraid of me. I’d never hurt you. Your voice, your touch, was what pulled me through the darkness.”
Her eyes searched his as if she could find all the answers to her questions there. “We weren’t sure you’d make it back. When they first brought you in we didn’t think you’d last through the night. But I hoped …” She let her voice trail off and again her cheeks filled with color.
“I know, and it was your hope that made the difference.” He knew his words pleased her. He also knew that the connection she’d felt for him had been more than patient and nurse.
In a perfect world he would have loved to explore the crazy connection they shared. He would have loved to pursue a normal relationship with her, but this wasn’t a perfect world and he wasn’t a normal man.
“There’s a twenty-four-hour discount store two blocks from here. I’ll go now and pick up some clothes for you,” she said. “Will you be okay here alone for thirty minutes or so?”
“I’ll be fine, but shouldn’t you get some sleep?” he asked.
“Right now I’m too wound up to sleep,” she replied.
“I’ll get you some things you need and then we’ll figure everything else out in the morning.”
“Willa, thank you.”
For the first time since she’d walked into his hospital room she smiled and it was just as he’d imagined—warm and inviting and lovely. “Don’t thank me yet. I still think that sometime between the time I left work and the time I walked back into your room I went completely and totally crazy.”
She walked back into the kitchen and he heard her grab her purse from the counter, then a moment later the sound of the garage door opening and then closing.
Jared listened to the sounds of the house, so different than the noise in the hospital. Rest. He needed to rest and get his strength back as quickly as possible. The men who were after him wouldn’t just go away.
Somehow they’d figured out that the John Doe in the hospital in Grand Forks was the man they sought. They knew he was in the area and he wouldn’t be safe until he could get far away and even then safety was just a desirable fantasy. Why it had taken them so long to find him, he wasn’t sure. But now that they had, they wouldn’t give up.
Willa. Thoughts of her jumped back into his mind. He’d told her the truth when he’d said that she’d been what had brought him through the darkness of the coma. He’d not only looked forward to her gentle touch and the pleasant scent of her perfume, but also the sound of her voice as she spoke to him and her thoughts that were both exciting and interesting in their very normalcy.
He would have loved to pursue something with her, something deep and meaningful, something hot and wild and like nothing he’d ever experienced before, but he was afraid for her. He brought nothing but danger to her and he couldn’t forget that.
He closed his eyes and wondered if he would ever be safe, if he would ever know what normal felt like.
THREE O’clock in the morning and she was in a store getting clothes for a man who had just come out of a six-month coma and insisted bad men were after him. She had to be out of her mind.
Willa pushed the shopping cart toward the men’s jeans section and hoped she guessed his size right. She could have waited until morning to do this, but she’d needed to get away from him for a few minutes and besides, she hadn’t wanted to see him in the morning with that skimpy butt-baring hospital gown. “And what a fine butt it is,” she muttered as she grabbed two pair of jeans that she thought would fit him.
Was he really in some kind of danger or was he delusional? she wondered as she headed to the T-shirts. She tossed a packet of three T-shirts in different colors into her basket and then frowned as she thought about underwear.
Boxers or briefs?
Briefs.
A gasp escaped her. It was definitely his voice she heard in her head. It was as if he stood next to her in the store and whispered in her ear.
Pulsuz fraqment bitdi.