“Were you waiting for me?” His voice cracked with a husky edge.
“No. But I knew you’d come.”
“Why?”
“You couldn’t resist the music.”
That haunting melody. “It…called to me.”
“I called to you.”
It remained dark all around them, but Lucas could see her eyes sparkle in the darkness. How was it that he could see her as clearly as though every chandelier in the room was lit, and yet shadow shrouded everything else?
Ashlynne—no, Ashe—smiled again, a sultry, knowing expression, and she scooted around to face him. “Why did you come down here, Lucas?” she asked, and he blinked. She looked—and sounded—so…patient.
“I heard you playing.”
“And that’s all?”
“No.” He reached for her, drew her upward. “Because of this.”
He hauled her tight against him and caught her mouth with his….
Shades of Gray
“A heartwarming voice and a story
about the power of love.”
—New York Times bestselling author Jennifer Greene
“Secrets, lies and revenge rule the day in this graphic
western drama. Danger mounts, passion flares, and lies
unfold as this stirring historical plays out
and characters evolve.”
—Affaire de Coeur
With much love for my mom, Lenore Romey, who never
told me I should be outside playing instead of reading
a book, and in memory of my father, Wendell Romey,
the most patient man I’ve ever known.
And, as always, for Doug, who loves me despite
all the trouble I cause, who makes everything work—
somehow—and who has been known to offer that
special endearment only a writer can appreciate:
“Aren’t you supposed to be writing?” I couldn’t do it without you, darlin’.
I love you all.
Special thanks must go to Willie and Candy Seltenrich
for their willing participation in this book. Legs all
the way to heaven, Candy, and not one broken bone!
Also to Heather Mase for filling in as the
Paperwork Queen so I could finish this book and
to Kathy Hafer for last-minute proofreading.
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Epilogue
Skagway, Alaska, February 1898
L ife was hell. It had been for longer than Lucas Templeton could remember, and there was no changing it. He’d gambled everything to learn that lesson—and he’d lost as completely as any man could. But that was old news and not particularly interesting any longer. Not to him, at least, and it was nobody else’s business.
It was part of the past and that’s exactly where he meant to see that it stayed.
Lucas lifted his shot glass and eyed the fine, clear whiskey with some appreciation. The glass was cool and smooth against his fingers and the alcohol shimmered with the taunt of a familiar amber color. The memory of its smooth, distinctive bite offered the lure of forgetfulness…if only he would give in to it.
He didn’t doubt the whiskey’s ability to make good on its promise; tonight he drank the expensive stuff, available to any man who could pay the price…and he could. He, in fact, owned the whole damned shebang—or at least this shebang. He sipped the whiskey with an appreciation for which few men in Alaska seemed to have the patience and turned to survey his domain.
The Star of the North. Lucas smiled and nodded, satisfied by what he saw. It wasn’t much, not by most standards anywhere else in the world. For him, it was everything.
One of the first saloons in Skagway, he had built it at precisely the right time. He’d had little competition at first and had unwittingly built the Star’s reputation by dealing fairly with his customers and offering a reasonable comfort not often found on the frontier. Now, less than a year later, he continued to enjoy a particular success that few of the others had matched.
He’d often thought that those who’d come later hadn’t wanted the triumph—or needed it—nearly as badly as he had. He’d even accepted that explanation for at least part of the difference.
But what about the rest of it?
He didn’t know for certain, nor had he ever wasted much time trying to figure it out. That kind of thinking could only lead him back to the reasons that this saloon mattered so very much in the first place, and all that was better left in the past. He needed no reminder of the life he’d once led.
It was enough that this life compared in no way to the one he’d left behind.
No. He corrected himself with an irritable scowl and tossed back the rest of the whiskey. Not left behind. He hadn’t left a damned thing behind. Everything he’d had had been stolen from him and he’d simply walked away from the devastation that had followed. There had been nothing left, no reason to stay.
And while it was true that he’d never planned a life such as this one for himself, it would do well enough. His success meant that he could do as he damn well pleased. He never could have done that in his other life. If it could be found in Skagway and he wanted it, he could have it.
Well, he might not go that far. An inherent trace of humility, the result of his Minnesota upbringing, stopped Lucas before he got too full of himself. He twisted his lips into a parody of a smile and dropped his glass to the well-used wooden table where he sat, then gestured to Willie, behind the bar, for a refill.
Undoubtedly, he reminded himself, he was in a much better position than most of the men who had poured into Alaska seeking gold over the past six months. And while he would have no trouble covering the expense of his choice of diversions, the reality of affording something and actually having it were two different things altogether.
He wasn’t exactly sure how much he really wanted the things he could afford. It was damn sure that he didn’t deserve them.
What do you think, you’ll be tempting God again if you aspire for too much? scoffed an inner voice that sounded entirely too mocking for his taste. And if the question came closer to the truth than Lucas found comfortable, he chose to pretend otherwise. He had other things with which to concern himself, things more important than this ridiculous tendency toward indulging his overdeveloped sense of self-pity.
Right now, he should be concentrating on the Star and its needs.
Business had been off tonight. Not necessarily bad, just…off. The atmosphere had been fractious and Lucas had broken up more than one argument that had run closer than usual to turning into a real fight. It might have been the cold that had set tempers on edge; the temperature had plummeted of late, typical enough for an Alaskan winter but trying for those unprepared for it. The brisk north wind in Skagway only made it seem worse.
Or it might be something else entirely, like the latest outbreak of killings—one a day, some said. Lucas hadn’t kept track, but he had no trouble believing the number. Ever since Soapy Smith and his band of troublemakers had taken over the town six months ago, lawlessness had soared and mayhem had become the rule of the streets.
“Here you go, sugar.”
A husky voice interrupted his wandering thoughts and Lucas glanced around. Sugar Candy, as she was known among the men, swept up next to him. She carried with her the cloying scent of roses that he would recognize without ever having to see her. Tonight, she’d fixed her red-tinted hair into a cascade of curls that looked far too formal and proper to suit her formfitting green gown. The dress displayed with astonishing blatancy her full, ample curves and long, slender legs.
Legs all the way to heaven. He remembered hearing one man describe her that way. Lucas allowed himself a small smile. He could appreciate the sentiment.
“Thanks, Candy.” He took the glass and did his best to ignore the way she preened under his attention. Such a response always made him uncomfortable.
He didn’t drink right away but instead set the glass on the table, next to the empty one. Candy didn’t move away.
“You want some company to go with that?”
He didn’t, not really. And yet he didn’t particularly want to sit here alone, either. He didn’t need the chance for his mind to wander back to those places and thoughts better left alone.
“All right.” He gestured to the chair opposite him. “Sit down.”
And so, he thought, he would pass the night—and his life—drinking expensive whiskey and wasting his time on a whore who meant nothing to him. It was exactly as he expected.
Exactly as he deserved.
And if he ever wished for something else?
Lucas blinked and shook his head. He didn’t. He wouldn’t. He knew better. He was lucky to have this much.
He picked up the shot glass and drank.
Ashlynne Mackenzie stepped into the saloon with no more fanfare than was necessary. Just the thought of where she was and what she was doing caused her to shiver. She managed to suppress it by sheer strength of will. She couldn’t afford the weakness or even the appearance of it.
What was the name of this place? Ashlynne looked around but saw nothing in particular to distinguish this saloon from the others she’d been in tonight. It was loud and bright, cheerful in a frenetic sort of way, and a good deal warmer than the outdoors.
Even that couldn’t make her like it here. She didn’t.
A saloon?
A saloon. The truth repeated itself in a heavy, condemning voice.
Oh, God.
What was she doing here? But she knew. This was, after all, the fifth or sixth one she’d been in. Ashlynne couldn’t remember for certain—and maybe, she thought, she didn’t want to remember. It was bad enough that she found herself here at all. Worse, she didn’t see Ian anywhere in this place, either.
Ashlynne swallowed a disappointed sigh and crossed her arms over her chest. The night was bitterly cold and a terrible draft blew in beneath the poorly hung door, but the chill had nothing to do with the way she stood. That was due to other, far more important reasons. Such as, with her arms clutched around herself and her hands tucked away, no one could see that she trembled.
Take your time, she reminded herself with as much cheerful encouragement as she could muster. She took a breath and looked around once more. The room stretched as deep as it did wide, with tables scattered throughout in no apparent order. A bar graced the far wall, a surprisingly sturdy wooden arrangement compared with some of the others she’d seen. The wall behind it boasted shelves that held an array of bottles and glasses. A gilt-framed mirror hung as the area’s centerpiece. It was, by far, the most prosperous-looking place she’d seen in Skagway.
She didn’t doubt that Ian’s first choice would be a place very much like this.
Reminded of the urgency of her mission, Ashlynne turned to inspect the men who lounged at the various tables. They seemed contented enough, drinking the night away or staring dumbly at the capricious luck of the playing cards in their hands. But even looking again changed nothing.
Her heart sank. Ian wasn’t here.
She would have to keep looking.
“You lookin’ for someone, honey?”
“Come on over here, sweetheart, and give us a kiss for luck!”
The catcalls eliminated any errant sigh of disappointment. Her brief time in Skagway had already accustomed her to withholding her reactions. Ashlynne pressed her lips into a thin line rather than permit the scowl that would reveal more than she dared allow in a place such as this. Especially for a woman alone…
She turned to leave without ever having stepped more than a foot away from the entrance—and then she saw him.
It wasn’t Ian. Instead a stranger threaded his way through the scattered tables and chairs. Heading straight for her.
She should have been swamped with disappointment that it wasn’t Ian—or at least troubled by a new fear. Oddly enough, she was neither. She was, instead…captivated. By nothing more than the sight of this man. She’d never before been so taken by the mere sight of anyone.
He was big and muscular. Surprisingly so, she thought. He dressed in a fine broadcloth suit like those worn by the most elegant businessmen in San Francisco, and he was, she realized, even taller than Ian. That put him several inches over six feet and well above her own five foot five. And as he moved closer, his features became more distinct, appearing far less rugged than she would have expected for a man who seemed at home in the wilderness of Alaska.
Or in a saloon.
He looked to be in his prime, no more than thirty, and almost…aristocratic. His nose was straight, perhaps a little too big to be considered perfect, but it suited his high cheekbones and clean-shaven, square jaw. And while his dark blue eyes pierced her with the force of his stare, they did little enough to draw her attention away from his mouth. His lips were full in a classic bow shape, and the whole image gave him an improper, seductive air.
An air of wickedness. Something…irresistible. And something that enticed and repelled with equal fervor.
Or did that impression come from his overlong blond hair? It scraped well past his collar, almost to his shoulders, and tumbled into his eyes. The blunt cut looked tantalizingly tousled, as if he had done nothing more than run his fingers through it once he’d left his bed. Or perhaps someone else—one of the soiled doves who seemed to abound in Skagway?—had done it for him.
Ashlynne swallowed, astonished by the shamelessness of her thoughts. Her heart had found an extra, erratic beat that left her gasping. She tried to catch her breath but couldn’t seem to manage it. Her heart stumbled, her breathing continued with no apparent rhythm…and the man kept coming.
What was wrong with her? He was just a man, after all.
He stopped an arm’s length away and frowned. “Who are you?” he demanded without preamble.
“I…” His rudeness sent her thoughts tumbling with a new uncertainty and she couldn’t quite formulate the haughty answer she might have liked. “I’m Ashlynne Mackenzie. Who are you?”
He blinked, as though he hadn’t expected the question. But then, she hadn’t exactly planned to make such a request of him and certainly not in such a saucy tone. She regretted it the instant it was too late. She wanted these people—these strangers—to help her; insolence would hardly encourage them to do so.
“I’m Lucas Templeton.” The man surprised her when he answered, considering how very…detached he sounded. The fire in his eyes was gone, as well. Still, he didn’t look away and the aloof distance in his stare left her feeling nearly as uneasy as had his earlier vehemence. She refused to let him see it, however.
“I own the Star of the North,” he added after a moment.
“The Star—” She blinked and cast a cursory glance around her. It was an unthinking reaction; she hadn’t forgotten for a moment where she was or why she was here. “That’s the name of this place? The Star of the North?”
“You didn’t know?”
She shook her head, thinking instead that she would be safe to settle her gaze somewhere near Lucas Templeton’s shoulder. Unfortunately looking at him at all only made her more aware of his strength and size in an entirely new—and intimate—way.
She jerked her gaze up to his and held herself steady as she tried to regulate her breathing. “I’m sorry,” she said, hoping her apology might give her a reprieve from the bone-deep intensity of his glare. “I’ve been in so many of these places tonight I lost track.”
“So many?”
The question, low and incredulous, kept her eyes drawn to his, no matter that she knew better. In spite of the dim interior, she could see that his expression remained narrowed with distrust. In fact, he made no attempt to disguise it; he didn’t blink or look away, revealing exactly what he wanted her to see.
“I…yes.” She swallowed in an effort to free up an answer. Surely that would help with this breathlessness—wouldn’t it? “I’ve been in a number of—”
“How many?” he interrupted.
“I beg your pardon?” Her spine stiffened despite her very precarious situation. Perilous predicament or not, she didn’t tolerate anyone making such rude, autocratic demands of her.
“How many?” he repeated as he stepped forward.
He smelled of whiskey. Ashlynne caught the scent, a familiar one that made her want to back away. She resisted the impulse and the weakness it would reveal, reminding herself sternly that she had no excuse for it. She’d known exactly what to expect before she’d ever entered the first saloon. She’d grown up as a Mackenzie in San Francisco, after all. Her father had been very clear in his choice of vices and he’d trained his only son quite effectively to follow in his footsteps.
And if his daughter had proved to be an utter failure…well, fate had given her this unexpected chance to succeed.
“How many?” Templeton asked again. His voice came sharp with impatience this time.
Ashlynne stiffened and offered him a disapproving glare. “Five or six,” she said woodenly.
“And why would you do that?” He paused and angled his head as though suddenly looking at her from a different perspective. “Are you looking for work?”
“No!” She meant to resist the provocation of this man’s impolite questions, but the word came out too sharp all the same. “I am not looking for work. I’m looking for—someone.”
Just because she answered, she didn’t have to give him any more information than was strictly necessary. Even so, she couldn’t afford to dismiss him too quickly; Lucas Templeton left little doubt that he was not a man to be denied.
Besides, she didn’t yet know if he could help her.
She forced herself to ignore her inner uncertainties and looked at Templeton once more, straight-on this time. “His name is Ian Mackenzie. Have you seen him?”
Templeton shrugged with little apparent interest. “I don’t know. I don’t know every man who comes into the Star. I don’t even know most of them. What does he look like?”
Anxiously, Ashlynne began her recitation. “He’s tall, although not as tall as you are.” Her gaze skittered away when she heard how personal her observation sounded and she hurried on. “His hair is dark and he’s dressed…well—” she waved a hand toward the room in general “—I suppose like most of the men here.”
Realizing what she’d done, she retucked her not-quite-steady hand under the opposite arm before anyone—most especially Lucas Templeton—could notice.
He didn’t seem impressed with her words, nor did he show any interest in her movements. He lifted an eyebrow to disappear beneath the hair that had fallen over his forehead. “You just described half the men here.”
“Yes, it would seem so.” She couldn’t argue with the truth. “We’ve been in Skagway a few days and—”
“A cheechako?” The word sounded like the same accusation as whenever else Ashlynne had heard it. No one wanted to be a greenhorn, it seemed; they all wanted the knowledge and experience of a seasoned Alaskan.
A sourdough.
“Yes,” she agreed.
“What makes you think he’d be in here?”
Ashlynne swallowed a weary sigh. She had no intention of admitting to this man—or to anyone—that she had no idea where Ian might be.
He’d been so good on board the ship. Then they’d arrived and the frenzied excitement of Skagway had immediately taken hold of him, like the first taste of alcohol to a drunk. Ian had reverted to his old habits so quickly, Ashlynne still didn’t quite know how it had happened.
She did know her brother, however—and better than she might have liked at times. The only things he might require for an evening’s entertainment would be women, gambling and liquor. The Star of the North boasted all three.
Why wouldn’t he come here?
“Is something wrong, sugar?”
A new voice intruded and Ashlynne realized that she’d missed the approach of another woman. A woman who belonged in a place like this.
The newcomer sidled up behind Templeton and slipped her arm around his waist to stand next to him, hip to hip. Her red hair appeared quite shocking at first, but a second look gave it more of a hint of the…exotic. She was tall—nowhere near Templeton’s height but claiming several inches over Ashlynne—and she had the kind of figure that appealed to men. It was a perfect hourglass, accented most daringly by the snug fit of her emerald-green silk gown and its décolletage.
“Nothing’s wrong, Candy.” Templeton didn’t turn to look at the woman as he spoke but continued to stare in Ashlynne’s direction.
“What’s she doing here?” Candy narrowed her eyes a fraction to shoot Ashlynne a look undoubtedly more distrustful than welcoming.
“Looking for someone.” Finally, Templeton released Ashlynne from the grip of his glare and slanted a glance in Candy’s direction instead. “His name’s Ian Mackenzie. Have you seen him?”
The other woman shrugged in a seductive, graceful way that Ashlynne could never imitate—and why would she want to? She didn’t want to be anything like these women who worked in saloons, and she didn’t want to have anything to do with a man like Lucas Templeton.
“I don’t know,” Candy was saying. “I suppose I could have seen him.” She looked at Ashlynne and winked, her painted lips curving upward with a knowing smile. “You know I don’t always get their names, sugar. What’s he look like?”
“Like most of the men in Skagway,” Templeton snapped with clear impatience. “And he hasn’t been in here tonight.”
“Well, I’ll be gla-ad—” Candy extended the word to two syllables “—to keep an eye out for him. If I find him…”
“Go on back to the table,” said Templeton.
“But, sugar—”
“Go on.” He indicated the room behind him with a jerk of his head but otherwise didn’t move. “I’ll be there in a minute.”
Candy cast a frown of pure frustration in Ashlynne’s direction, then flounced away with a sharp rustle of her skirts.
Could she ever achieve that same effect, both feminine and dramatic at the same time? The question stunned Ashlynne with its secret jealousy. She lowered her lashes in shame as the now familiar breathlessness began to fill her chest again. Oh, God, this night, this place…
“It doesn’t look like I can help you.” Templeton’s voice, low and rough, didn’t disguise his impatience. “Nobody named Ian Mackenzie has been in here tonight.”
She swallowed a tired sigh and nodded with the same weariness. “Yes, of course. It’s as I expected. Thank you.”
And then, before any other foolishness—or Lucas Templeton’s handsome face—got the better of her, she turned away. Gathering her determination—and whatever composure was left to her—Ashlynne stepped out into the cold night air and started for the next saloon.
Things continued to go from bad to worse!
Left to his own devices, Lucas discovered with some disgust that he’d lost any real taste for whiskey or women. He frowned. He’d been content enough to relax and sip his whiskey, with or without Candy’s company. So why had that changed? He refused to believe it had been because of Ashlynne Mackenzie’s very temporary interruption.
But that thought did bring up another question. What the hell did she think she was doing, going from saloon to saloon looking for her wastrel husband? Lucas could hardly berate her for her choice of mates; he didn’t know enough about her situation to do so. But her reckless actions would be risky enough in most civilized parts of the world. To do so here, in Skagway? She must have been out of her mind—or as naive as she looked.
Recalling his first sight of Ashlynne, Lucas might have smiled if he hadn’t sensed such…trouble about her. She’d stood by the door, so clearly out of place and with her arms crossed protectively over her chest. Her dark blue cloak had wrapped around her like a suit of armor. She was of average height, though the rest of her shape had been far less apparent. She’d peered around the room with obvious unease, as though she’d just stumbled into a nest of vipers.
That thought, finally, gave Lucas a crooked twist of a smile. Some might well say that she had—and she hardly looked the part for such a task.
She couldn’t have been older than twenty, or just past the age. Her hair was the color of mink and she’d scraped it back from her face in a severe hairstyle that should have done nothing to make her look attractive. It had, in fact, accented each of her features at their most elemental: high forehead, arched cheekbones, painfully straight nose and full, finely shaped lips. Her eyes had provided the most surprise; they’d flickered with a golden light that was nothing if not the color of whiskey.
Lucas settled back in his chair at the same table where he always sat and thought about Ashlynne Mackenzie’s eyes. He hadn’t seen anything quite like them, expressive and yet guarded at the same time. But then, that described nearly everything about her. She was nothing like the working girls who made their ways north. Aside from that, she was worlds different from Emily.
His stomach knotted and he signaled for another drink. Maybe he hadn’t been in the mood moments ago, but now, suddenly, he needed the alcohol. The last thing he could tolerate were comparisons between Emily and a woman he didn’t even know. There could be no comparison. Emily had been…special. Unique. A woman not quite of this earth. And Ashlynne Mackenzie was…not. She was simply one more woman who had most likely made a questionable match and now had to live with the consequences.
It was none of his concern.
“You thirsty, sugar?”
Candy sidled up from behind him, scattering his thoughts as she delivered whiskey in a fresh glass. She bent low, hesitating long enough to draw considerable attention to the thrust of her breasts. Balancing herself with one hand on his shoulder, she offered him a seductive smile and leaned close, running her fingers down his chest and toying with the buttons of his vest beneath the suit jacket. Instinct urged him to pull away, but something else—some latent sense of self-preservation—stopped him. He needed to put behind him these unnerving memories of Emily, these unwelcome thoughts of Ashlynne Mackenzie. There could be no better way to do it than with another—and most certainly available—woman.
He lifted one corner of his mouth in a smile. “Where have you been, Candy? Looking for a better man?”
She gave him a wide smile of her own, made up of equal parts knowing seduction and wicked invitation. “There isn’t a better man in all of Skagway, sugar. I was just giving you some time to remember there’s no better woman than me.”
Lucas couldn’t help himself. He laughed at Candy’s audacity and took a moment to remind himself of just how much a man he was. Not only that, but Candy was most definitely a woman. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t a man worth wanting—at least not in the traditional sense. Anything between Candy and him had nothing to do with that.
It was only sex and nothing permanent.
He reached up to tangle his fingers with hers. “Just what did you have in mind?” he asked in a voice pitched low enough to sound deliberately suggestive.
Candy smiled, a familiar expression that spoke of both seduction and attraction—and generated little response within Lucas. Uneasy, he searched for another smile, a real one this time, and parted his lips when she leaned farther down.
Her mouth settled over his with unerring precision and Lucas waited for his body to awaken. Of the few girls with whom he’d spent any time, Candy had always been one of his favorites. Tonight, though, when she sent her tongue forward to twine around his, he knew only a mild aversion for her kiss. Neither the taste of her nor the cloying scent of rosewater enticed him to want anything more. Certainly he had no urge to take her to his bed—or anything else. Rather, some deep, elemental part of him wanted to pull away, to rub his hand across his mouth and wipe away the taste of her.
Don’t be crazy, he told himself impatiently, and opened his mouth to deepen the kiss. He’d let his emotions, his thoughts, become too stirred up tonight—and not in a good way. He needed to find a release for the tension that coursed through him.
Not just any release, but a sexual one. He made the point for himself deliberately.
Lucas reached up to shove his fingers into Candy’s carefully styled hair and anchored her mouth against his. She made a deep, guttural noise that he took to mean approval—or agreement, at the very least—and her tongue picked up the dance, swirling through the cavern of his mouth. It plunged deeper, darted away, then plunged again before she finally wrenched her mouth free.
“You want to go someplace, sugar?” Her whisper sounded like more of a pant and she arched her breasts toward him with brazen disregard for others in the room. “We can go in the back. Or we can go to my place. It’s—”
A sharp sound cut off her invitation. It came strange and unexpected and not immediately identifiable. The others in the Star fell silent, as well, all listening. Lucas paused to catch his breath, more labored than he might have expected after Candy’s kiss, and the sound echoed in his mind. Scuffling noises from outside gave him another clue, and then it hit him.
Gunfire.
The sound had been a pistol shot, and in Skagway, that could mean only one thing.
Pulsuz fraqment bitdi.