Her breasts rose and fell as she heaved out a heavy breath. “I’ve made a decision regarding your marriage proposal.”
His hand on her arm tightened perceptibly. He’d never expected an answer from her tonight. He’d wanted her to weigh the situation and her feelings about it carefully. But apparently she’d made up her mind without too much thought.
Liam tried to mentally brace himself as he studied her grave expression. “Are you sure, Kitty?”
Her eyes never wavered from his. “Yes. I’m sure that I want to be your wife.”
Dear Reader,
As I began to write about the Donovan family, I soon came to the realization that Liam would be the last sibling to find love. It was obvious to me that he was a special man and it would take extra time for the right woman to come along and heal his wounded heart.
Next to love, I believe grief might be the most powerful emotion a human can experience. In some cases it stops a person cold. In others it pushes them to start over and search for a way to fill the emptiness inside them.
In Liam’s case, he’s lost the will to search for a new beginning, but when he finally does, he slowly realizes that life can offer second chances and love is worth risking everything.
For those of you who’ve been reading the Donovan stories, thank you so much. And please don’t think you have to say goodbye to this family. More MEN OF THE WEST stories will be coming, and some of them might even include a long-lost Donovan or two!
God bless each trail you ride with love and happiness,
Stella
STELLA BAGWELL has written more than seventy novels for Mills & Boon. She credits her loyal readers and hopes her stories have brightened their lives in some small way.
A cowgirl through and through, she loves to watch old Westerns, and has recently learned how to rope a steer. Her days begin and end helping her husband care for a beloved herd of horses on their little ranch located on the south Texas coast. When she’s not ropin’ and ridin’, you’ll find her at her desk, creating her next tale of love.
The couple have a son, who is a high school math teacher and athletic coach. Stella loves to hear from readers and invites them to contact her at stellabagwell@gmail.com.
His Texas Baby
Stella Bagwell
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To horses, for the love and inspiration they give us,
and the hopes and dreams we hang upon them.
The woman was pregnant!
Liam Donovan stopped in his tracks and stared down the long shed row. Between him and Kitty Cartwright a hot walker led a sweaty black thoroughbred toward an open doorway, a jockey’s valet carrying a saddle and tack hurried past, while a nearby horse hung his head over a gate and nickered loudly. Shafts of sunlight illuminated dust particles and bits of hay dancing through the air, and behind him a worker sang along to a nearby radio. Yet none of those things distracted Liam’s focus away from Kitty. Even at a distance, the silhouette of her rounded tummy was very evident and the sight stunned him.
When had this happened? Like a tornado sweeping over the plains, the question roared through his head. Three months ago, when he’d attended her father’s funeral in El Paso, she’d appeared as slim as ever. And though they’d only exchanged a few words as he’d offered his condolences, she’d said nothing to even hint at her condition.
But then why would she? The fact that Kitty was having a baby was none of his business. Or was it? He’d only been in her bed that one time. And that had been at least five or six months ago. The bump of her belly didn’t look that far along, did it? Besides, if he was the father she would’ve surely contacted him before now.
As Kitty stood near a stall door, talking with a young man he knew to be an assistant trainer for Desert End, Liam continued to stare. Since he’d only landed in Los Angeles yesterday, Liam hadn’t yet learned whether Kitty or the Cartwrights’ entourage of horses would be stabled at Hollywood Park Racetrack for the spring/summer meet. He’d heard talk through the racing grapevine that she would be coming, filling the position of head trainer for Desert End Stables; a position that had been held by her father, the late, great Willard Cartwright for forty years. But Liam had tried to ignore the information and tell himself that it didn’t matter if or when he might be seeing Kitty again. Now the rapid beat of his heart proved just how much he’d been lying to himself.
Inside the pockets of his jean jacket, his hands curled into loose fists as his gaze took in the lovely tanned oval of her face, the long blond hair spilling down her black sweater, the faded denim hugging her hips and thighs. When he’d first met her seven years ago, she’d been an awkward teenager with a fanatic love for horses. But sometime between then and now, she’d turned into a woman. And now she was carrying a baby. But whose? Could it possibly be his? The question whammed him between the eyes like a sledgehammer driving a steel spike, leaving him feeling dazed and queasy.
“Liam, I’m feeling uneasy about this ankle. I’d like for you to take a look.”
The request came from Clint, one of the Diamond D grooms who’d accompanied the Donovan horses to California. Even though the young man was at least ten years younger than Liam’s thirty-five, he’d been working for the Donovans since he was twelve years old and since then he’d grown into a competent horseman that Liam could trust implicitly. If he was concerned about a horse’s condition, then Liam was concerned, too.
Forcing his eyes away from Kitty, Liam opened the half gate and stepped inside the cinderblock stall, where Clint was standing next to a big red thoroughbred named Reckless Rendezvous.
Normally, nothing distracted Liam from his job. But seeing Kitty again—and pregnant at that—was wrecking his ability to focus. As he knelt next to the right front foot of the horse, Liam tried to clear his mind while he carefully ran his hands over the ankle, fetlock and up the cannon bone. “Nothing feels warm,” Liam announced. “And I don’t feel anything amiss. Have you noticed any change in his gait?”
Clint said, “Yesterday, when we unloaded him from the plane, I thought he was a bit gimpy. But he could have just been stiff from the long ride. Or it could have just been my imagination. But I’d rather be safe than sorry, so I wanted you to have a look.”
Rising to his full height, Liam slapped a comforting hand on the younger man’s shoulder. “I don’t think there’s anything wrong. But we’ll get it x-rayed anyway.”
“His workout is scheduled for tomorrow morning at seven,” Clint reminded him.
“I’ll go over to the equine hospital in a few minutes and see about getting the X-ray,” Liam promised. “Right now I want to know if you and Andy have settled in and have everything you need.”
Clint and Andy, the other groom who had accompanied them on this three-and-half-month stay in California, would be living in small quarters located next to the horses’ stalls. The beds were merely adequate and space for more than the bare necessities limited. Liam understood how much the men and his two female hot walkers, who would be housed in another area of the barn, sacrificed in order to do their jobs. That’s why the Diamond D paid them handsomely and Liam made sure they had every possible convenience he could give them.
“Sure, Liam. Don’t worry about any of us. We’re all just excited to be here.”
Down through the years, Liam had made a habit of shipping five or six of his better runners to Hollywood Park Racetrack for the spring/summer racing meet. During the three month period, he would fly in and out as each respective race date grew near, while allowing his assistant to remain in California to handle the daily training chores. But Clete, his longtime and very trusted assistant, had passed away a little more than three years ago and Liam still couldn’t find it in his heart to even attempt to replace him. The loss had forced Liam to take on more of a workload and change the routine of his plans and schedules.
This year he’d decided to bring his best to the West Coast and personally stay for the entire duration of the meet; unless some unforeseen emergency called him back to the Diamond D. Now, after seeing Kitty in this condition, he wondered if he’d made a huge mistake. Not that he’d come here to have some sort of steady relationship with her. No. They were friends, not lovers. They’d only been together that one time because he’d unexpectedly run into Kitty and her father while visiting Lone Star Park Racetrack in north Texas. The three of them had eaten dinner together, but before the meal was over Will had been called away on business. Liam had remained with Kitty and the two of them had lingered over a bottle of wine. Maybe a little too much wine. Eventually, Liam had offered to walk her back to her Dallas hotel room and once they’d gotten there, one thing had led to another.
Later that night, before he’d left her hotel room, she’d explained that she wasn’t ready for any sort of serious relationship with him and that she hoped they could simply go on being friends instead of lovers. Even though Liam hadn’t been looking for anything permanent with the woman, his ego had been a bit stung by her attitude. And the idea that she hadn’t enjoyed their passionate union enough to want a repeat had been enough to jerk his feet back to solid earth. That same night he’d assured her that nothing had really changed and as far as he was concerned they’d remain friends and nothing more.
The next day he’d flown to Remington Park at Oklahoma City to deal with a runner he’d entered in a Derby and then he’d headed home to New Mexico and done his best to push the woman from his mind. Two months passed without seeing or talking with her. And then the news of Willard’s death had stunned the racing world and he’d traveled to El Paso to attend the man’s funeral and offer Kitty his condolences.
Since then, he’d continued to fight with the memory of that night they’d recklessly fallen into each other’s arms. He’d been telling himself to put it all behind him and move on. She had her life and he had his. And his didn’t include having a hot affair with a fellow horse trainer. He wasn’t the affair type. Nor was he the marrying type. And she’d made it clear to him that she wasn’t interested in those things, either.
But the memory of making love to Kitty had somehow been burned into his brain and returned to haunt him at moments when he least expected it. And he’d wondered if she ever thought of him and that night, ever longed for him. But now, seeing her belly filled with child, he could only wonder who’d taken his place in her bed. Had she fallen in love? Was she planning to marry?
How do you know some other man has moved into her life? Do you know for certain that the baby isn’t yours, Liam? You made love to the woman. And, yeah, she told you she was using birth control, but you’re a smart enough guy to know that nothing is one hundred percent effective.
Shutting his ears to the voice going off in his head, Liam dropped his hand from Clint’s shoulder and turned his attention back to Reckless. He didn’t want to consider that there was a reasonable chance the baby might be his. The idea was too terrifying. He repressed the memories and spoke to Clint.
“If everything checks out okay,” he said to the groom, “I want you to have Liv hand walk him in the barn area for about thirty minutes.”
“Right. I’ll make sure,” Clint assured him.
Liam gave him a few more instructions concerning the remaining horses then left the stall in a purposeful stride.
A quick glance to his right revealed that Kitty was still standing in the same area he’d spotted her in a few moments ago. This time she was speaking to a woman who appeared to be a barn worker. Were Kitty’s horses also stalled in barn 59? Hell, any other time he would have been happy to share a training barn with the woman. And he’d promised her that they would remain friends. But seeing her pregnant had done something to him. His feelings were being yanked in all different directions.
He was trying to decide whether to go greet her or beat a hasty retreat to his office, when she happened to glance his way. Recognition instantly hit her face and she stared for a few brief seconds before turning her attention back to the barn worker.
If she’d given him a smile, a tiny wave, signaled him with some sort of acknowledgment, he would have gone on to his office and waited for a quieter moment to say hello to her. But her blatant dismissal caught him by surprise and sent him striding down the shed row until he reached her.
“I’ll get right on it, Miss Cartwright,” the barn worker was saying as Liam walked up to Kitty’s left shoulder. “Just let me know if you need anything.”
“Thanks, Gina. I appreciate you. Please remember that.”
As the tall, huskily built woman turned and hurried away, she nodded a passing greeting to Liam. Once she was out of earshot, Kitty turned and looked up at him.
“Hello, Liam.”
Even though there was a faint smile on her soft lips, he could see shadows in her blue eyes and he wondered if grief over losing her father had put them there or something else. Either way, the faint sadness in her gaze didn’t diminish her beauty. It struck him hard and jerked him right back to that night when their lips had met and he’d driven himself deep inside her.
“Kitty,” he greeted as he tried to stem the erotic memories. “How are you?”
Her smile wavered, but only for a brief moment. “I’m good. Very excited to be back at Hollywood Park. What about yourself?”
She was making an attempt to be cordial, but he couldn’t miss the impersonal tone in her voice. He’d not really known what to expect when they met again, away from the crowd of mourners at her father’s funeral. In all of his imaginings, it hadn’t been like this. Kitty had always been a soft, caring person, a woman who never said a cross word to anything or anyone. With him, she’d always been warm, open and straightforward. He wasn’t feeling that now. She was holding back a part of herself and that troubled him. Even hurt him.
“I got here yesterday with the rest of my crew,” he told her. “We’re just now getting the horses and ourselves settled.”
She nodded stiffly. “I wasn’t aware until this morning that we’d be sharing the same barn. Did you bring many horses this time?”
“Twenty,” he answered. There were eighteen training barns and enough stalls to house nearly two thousand horses on the track, he thought, and somehow he and Kitty had managed to wind up in the same facility. At this moment, Liam couldn’t decide whether that was a stroke of misfortune or a piece of good luck.
She looked away from him and swallowed and he used the opportunity to let his gaze slide down to her belly. The soft mound beneath her sweater somehow made her look more feminine and vulnerable and an odd little pang suddenly struck him in the middle of the chest. He wanted to reach out and pull her into his arms so badly he could very nearly taste it.
“Oh. I only brought half that many,” she said. “With Dad dying, some of our training got put on hold. A few of the three-year-olds that belong to Desert End still need gate schooling. I may have them shipped out here later for the latter half of the meet.”
Desert End Stables, Kitty’s home and training facility, was located just north of El Paso, Texas. Liam had visited the place a few times in years past. It was a beautiful horse farm that sprawled for miles over the West Texas desert. Willard had not only been a highly successful trainer, but also a noted breeder in the business. Even though Willard had a son from a former marriage, Liam had heard that Desert End and all its holdings, which would amount to a vast fortune in itself, had gone to Kitty. He supposed the old man had made that decision because Owen had never had anything to do with the horse business and worked as a Deputy Sheriff for Hudspeth County in Texas. Still, Liam had no doubt that Willard had made sure his son had received a fair share of inheritance in monetary form. From all he knew, father and son had gotten along well.
“I miss the hell out of Will,” Liam said suddenly, his voice gruff with emotion. “I can’t imagine how you must feel.”
She looked back at him and he noticed a glaze of moisture in her blue eyes. Maybe he shouldn’t have mentioned her father, he thought, but Willard had been a huge presence in both of their lives. His memory could never be ignored or forgotten. It simply wasn’t possible.
“Nothing has been easy since we buried Dad,” she admitted, her voice low and strained. “But everyone loses a loved one at some time in their life. This time it just happened to be me.”
Yeah. He knew all too well what she meant about losing a loved one. One minute he’d had a wife and a baby on the way, the next minute they’d been gone, wiped out of his life when the car she’d been driving through heavy fog had careened off a mountain highway. Since the tragic accident, no woman had caught his interest in any way. Until Kitty. Something about her had made him want again, feel again. And now, with her standing only inches away, she was reminding him that he was a red-blooded man, full of needs and desires.
“I’m sorry, Kitty,” he said lowly. “Really sorry.”
Her eyes blinked and then she turned her gaze toward the stall to her left, where a black horse was nipping at a hay bag. The nameplate on the stall door read Mr. Marvel and Liam remembered the colt as being one of Willard’s favorites. No doubt that everywhere Kitty looked, she was surrounded by bittersweet memories of her father.
Even so, she obviously had other things to think about and plan for, Liam concluded. Like the baby in her womb and the man who’d put it there. Could that man possibly be him? No! It couldn’t be. She wouldn’t be standing here like this, ignoring the obvious. She would have already told him months ago. Or would she?
Dragging in a heavy breath, he resisted the urge to give his head a shake. This was crazy, he thought. It felt like there was a fire in the barn and both of them were standing there, ignoring it as though nothing was wrong.
Her voice suddenly interrupted his thoughts as she said, “I’ll survive, Liam. Dad expected the best from me. I can’t break down on him now and ruin everything he worked a lifetime to build.”
“Kitty.” She sounded so crushed and weary that Liam could hardly bear it and before he could think about it, he placed a comforting hand on her forearm. “Is there anything I can do?”
She didn’t answer immediately and Liam supposed his offer didn’t mean much. After all, she had the means to hire the best people in the business to keep her stable working efficiently and her win rate at a high percentage. As for emotional support, he figured she had plenty of friends and distant relatives to share her problems with. She certainly didn’t need Liam. The idea left him feeling strangely flat.
“I don’t know,” she answered finally, then lifted her gaze to his face. “Do you think you could have dinner with me tonight?”
This area of the state was known for its earthquake tremors and for a split second Liam wondered if the ground beneath his feet was tilting. She’d never invited him to join her anywhere, at any time, and he’d always talked himself out of asking her for a date or anything even resembling one. The only reason they’d ever spent time in each other’s company was her father. In fact, Willard had once approached him about dating Kitty. The older man had believed that Liam and his daughter would make a fine pair, considering they both loved the same profession. But Liam had dismissed Will’s suggestion. At that time his wife’s fatal accident had still been fresh in his mind and he’d not been interested in dating anyone. And now—well, he still wasn’t interested. Not with the loss of Felicia continuing to haunt him.
He was trying to gather himself enough to respond, when she said, “If you have other engagements don’t worry about it. We can get together some other time.”
He shook his head as his thoughts raced around her motives and his schedule. “I have to meet someone at seven this evening,” he finally said. “But that won’t take more than fifteen minutes. Will seven-thirty fit your schedule?”
She looked strangely relieved, a reaction that confused Liam even more. If she’d needed to see or talk with him, all she’d needed to do was pick up the phone and let him know. Her wanting to have dinner with him tonight seemed strange and out of the blue. Yet the idea of spending time with her excited him more than he wanted to admit.
“Seven-thirty would be great,” she told him. “You can pick me up at my office. It’s at the opposite end of the barn. I’ve already posted my nameplate, so you shouldn’t have any trouble finding it.”
“All right. I’ll see you then.” Realizing he still had hold of her arm, he forced himself to drop his hand. “Is there anyplace special you’d like to eat? I’ll make reservations.”
“I don’t need special. Just anywhere simple and quiet.”
“Fine. Seven-thirty then.”
A tiny smile lifted the corners of her lips and the sight encouraged him. No matter the situation with this woman’s personal life, he wanted her to be happy. Especially with him.
“Yes,” she agreed. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a temperamental mare waiting for me to put on her blinkers.”
“Sure,” he told her. “I have work waiting, too.”
Kitty didn’t allow herself a second look at the man as he turned and walked away. She didn’t need to. His chiseled features, hazel-green eyes and streaked brown hair were all ingrained in her memory just as much as his tall, solidly built body. He might not be the most handsome guy she’d ever laid eyes on, but he was darn sure the sexiest. And six months ago that latent sexuality had been her undoing.
For days afterward, she’d blamed her reckless behavior on the wine she’d consumed at dinner that night. But deep in her heart she’d known two glasses of wine hadn’t made her fall into bed with Liam Donovan.
She’d first met Liam seven years ago, when she’d been nineteen and just beginning to travel extensively with her father. She’d instantly been smitten with the man, not only with his raw, sexy looks, but also with his training skills. And since that time, little by little, she’d come to learn more about who he was as a man.
Around the track, he had a reputation for being fair and honest, but also hard-driven. Kitty would agree he was all those things and more. He was an extremely private man, who rarely talked about his personal life, which in a way had always made him seem just that much more intriguing to Kitty.
It had been through an offhand comment from her father that she’d learned Liam had lost his wife and unborn child in a car accident a little more than six years ago, but Liam himself had never spoken to her about such things. With her, he’d only discussed training methods, auctions, sires, the pros and cons of different tracks and all the other zillion and one factors that went into racing thoroughbreds. But those discussions had been enough to reveal glimpses of the man and his way of thinking. She admired him, she was wildly attracted to him and she feared she was even in love with him. Fear being the key word. Because from what she could see, Liam Donovan was a demanding perfectionist and never would be an easygoing family man. Along with that, her father had admitted, long before he’d died, that he’d tried to talk Liam into dating Kitty and that Liam had refused. If he didn’t want to date her, it was a cinch there wasn’t a hope in hell that he’d ever fall in love with her.
Oh, God, why didn’t she just go home to Desert End and let Clayton take care of things here? There was plenty of work at the farm to keep her more than occupied. A barn filled with up-and-coming two-year-olds, along with a mix of older horses in training for races later in the summer.
But no, she’d chosen to come here. Because she’d known Liam would be here and she’d wanted to see him and be close to him again. Now she had to find the courage to tell him that he was going to be a father.
Swallowing the ball of emotion lodged in her throat, she turned to her left and entered stall number thirty where Blue Snow, one of her prize mares, was housed.
A slight grimace tightened Clayton’s features as he looked around at her. “Sorry, Kitty. You’d think by now she would let someone else put these things on her. But the more I tried the more worked up she was getting.”
“The last thing I want is for her to get hot and unsettled. So when she acts this way, just let her be and don’t worry about it,” Kitty instructed her assistant. “The time to start worrying is when she won’t let me put them on.”
Kitty took the pair of blinkers from him, but instead of rushing at the mare with the piece of equipment, she simply began to stroke her neck and face and talk to her in gentle, soothing tones.
“Is anything wrong, Kitty?”
Not bothering to look at him, she said, “Blue Snow is a bit high-strung. Especially when you’re dealing with her head. And I don’t have to tell you how important this filly is to me—to Desert End.”
“I know all of that. I’m not talking about Snow. I’m talking about you. You look like you’ve just seen a ghost.”
Liam was hardly a ghost. But he’d definitely haunted her thoughts for the past six months, Kitty thought. Ever since she’d gone to bed with him and a baby had been conceived.
“I’m fine, Clayton. I was just hurrying down the shed row and got a little winded, that’s all,” she explained.
The young man, who’d worked as Willard’s main assistant for the past year, cleared his throat. “Well—uh, I noticed you were talking with Liam Donovan. Is he causing you problems?”
Kitty inwardly groaned. Liam had certainly given her a problem, all right. Just not the sort that Clayton thought. But she wasn’t about to explain any of this to her assistant. At least, not yet.
Certainly everyone could clearly see she was pregnant. But no one knew who the father was or the circumstances surrounding her condition. And so far her family and friends had respected her privacy and stopped just short of pressing her for the father’s identity. She realized that eventually questions would have to be answered; especially to the few family members she had left. But first there was Liam to deal with and she had no idea how he was going to react to her and this news. The mere thought of confronting him left her ill.
“Why would you think he’d be a problem? His horses are stabled on the opposite end of this barn. He’ll be coming and going around here just like we will.”
The grimace on Clayton’s face deepened. “That’s exactly why he might be causing a problem. He’s damned picky and yells at his hands like they were slaves.”
She bit back a sigh. “He wants the best care for his horses and demands they get it. That’s all. No one is being forced to work for him.”
Clayton snorted. “He has the attitude that his runners are royalty and the rest of us deal in cheap claimers.”
Kitty stiffened. She liked Clayton and admired his work even more. She could always depend on him to keep things going whenever she wasn’t physically able to keep up. Still, she wasn’t going to stand by and let him badmouth Liam.
“That’s not true,” she said bluntly. “I should know. Liam is an old friend of the family. Weren’t you aware?”
The man’s face turned red. “Oh. No—I didn’t. I mean, I wasn’t aware of that.”
“He and my father were very close for many years.” She didn’t add that she and Liam had been even closer. Clayton and everyone else would learn that soon enough, she thought.
“Hmm. That’s surprising,” he remarked. “I’ve heard that Donovan can be a real hard-nosed bastard at times.”
“You hear all sorts of things in this business. I wouldn’t put too much stock in it. Success breeds jealousy.”
Turning back to the mare, she focused her attention on slipping the blinkers onto Blue Snow’s head. Thankfully the animal behaved and stood quietly while Kitty adjusted and buckled the equipment.
“That’s true,” Clayton agreed. “But frankly, I’m surprised your dad saw that much in the guy. They’re two different types of men.”
No, Kitty thought, Liam was very much like her late father. Maybe that’s why she’d gravitated toward the man in the first place. It was often said that women unconsciously sought out a man with a personality like their father’s. But on the other hand, it was because Liam was so strong-minded, so driven like Will, that she was now filled with angst.
When Will and Kitty’s mother, Francine, had divorced, he’d fought fiercely for the custody of his six-year-old daughter and eventually won. She didn’t want to think that Liam might do the same with this child. She wanted to believe he was a fair and compassionate man. But this was an entirely different situation. She wasn’t Liam’s wife. Still, with every fiber of her being she longed to be a hands-on, dedicated mother to her baby.
Pulsuz fraqment bitdi.